Derailed: Five Lessons Learned from Catastrophic Failures of Leadership

Derailed is about the traps you and I can fall into. Sometimes they are the result of the sense of entitlement that leaders can fall prey to. Sometimes they are the result of thinking and behavior that has worked (we think) in the past, so why change it now. Sometimes they are the overuse of a strength that we have yet to discipline. Sometimes we don’t even have a clue and so we get derailed and go around blaming others and asking “Why me?”

It can happen to anyone. And it is something we have to constantly be sensitive to because these traps are character issues that can disqualify us from leadership. Author Tim Irwin writes, “No matter how brilliant, charming, strategic, or commanding in presence a leader is, the consequences of a failed character are extraordinarily disabling and will bring down even the strongest among us. Similarly, if our character is inadequate, eventually we will miss the warning signals and slam into a parked freight train.”

To illuminate the impact and nature of derailment, Irwin profiles six leaders that either through arrogance, lack of self-awareness, a sense of entitlement, greed, self-discipline, or a combination of any or all, derailed. Derailment is a process. Irwin suggests that there are five stages: a failure of self-/other-awareness, hubris, missed early warning signals, rationalizing and finally derailment. A lack of self-awareness is the foundation of all derailments.

These are all issues of character. And stressful times only make us more of who we already are. Authenticity, self-management, humility and courage are dimensions of character that when properly developed, help us to avoid derailment. We can only be as good a leader as the character we possess.

Derailment is not inevitable, but without attention to development, it is probable. He writes, “Derailment is especially rooted in the failure to prepare, to grow personally and professionally, and to develop the qualities needed to stay on track…. Attention to our development means we must be constantly alert and self-aware and have a lifelong commitment to learn, to grow, and to prepare.”

To combat derailment you need to adapt five habits says Irwin. First, you need to develop a habit of openness. “Openness to feedback reflects our interest in being a learning, growing person.”

Second is the habit of self-/other-awareness. “It is critical that we regularly tune into how others see us.” When we find a big difference, we have a blind spot that needs to be addressed.

"We are all put to the test, but it never comes in the form or the point we would prefer, does it?" ~Anthony Hopkins, The Edge

The third habit is to cultivate personal early warning systems that can tell us when we are at risk of derailment. “The key is to monitor ourselves and to pay attention to our own signals or feedback from others. Exerting control over stress means that we do whatever is necessary to lower the stress level to one at which our performance is not compromised.”

We also need to develop a habit of accountability. “The leaders most susceptible to derailment refuse to have their opinions, decision, and actions questioned…. Accountability means that, even when we are not required to answer to others because of our position or corporate policy or law, we intentionally place ourselves in a relationship with someone who tests our motives and our actions.”

Finally, is to develop the habit of resiliency. “Resiliency is the ability not only to bounce back from adversity but also to grow from it.” A clear sense of purpose widens our perspective and helps us to become more resilient.

Sometimes we need a wake-up call to finally deal with our own issues. But we can learn vicariously. And that’s the best way to learn if we have the discipline. Tim Irwin’s book is a great place to begin. A guide for asking the hard questions.

Of Related Interest:

  Free Online Assessment: Tim Irwin has developed an online assessment This exercise will help you to identify your risk for derailment in four key areas. There are 48 questions within this assessment. It should take you 5-10 minutes to complete.

  12 Keys to Greater Self-Awareness

Note: This title is part of the publisher’s Nelsonfree program. By purchasing this book, you can also download both the e-book and the audio versions for free. Three for the price of one!

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:30 PM
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12 Keys to Greater Self-Awareness

There is no evidence to suggest that any species of animals other than humans come pre-packaged with a set of mechanisms for self-awareness. The degree to which we develop and use that capacity, in a constructive way, will largely determine our success in life.

Self-awareness is where leadership development begins. Self-management and authenticity flow from self-awareness. Self-awareness can be divided into four parts: what is known to us and others, what is known to others but not by us, what we know and others don’t and what we don’t know and others don’t either. Plumbing the depths of self-awareness takes time and more intensive tactics. However, our biggest gain in self-improvement can be had by finding out what others know that we don’t. And they know more than we think.

Here are twelve keys to greater self-awareness:

1. Stop blaming others for your choices. It’s you.
2. Take a personality assessment to help you gain some perspective.
3. Get feedback from as many significant people in your life as you can. This can be uncomfortable for both you and them, but it is the fastest method for gaining a better picture of yourself. (Make them feel safe. It's a big, unknown risk for them!)
4. Get a coach or mentor. They don't have to know more than you. They just have to see you in action and help you to be a better you. You're not as hard to figure out (complicated) as you would like to think.
5. Understand that your biggest irritations look a lot like you.
6. Look beneath your behavior to reveal your assumptions and filters. They dictate how you see yourself and others and impact how you relate to them.
7. Look at your roadblocks. Learn to separate facts from your interpretations of them.
8. A lot of negative interactions signal a selfish approach to life.
9. Reflect daily on your behavior. Ask questions like: How do I handle difficulties? What do I think or do when I don’t get my own way? How adaptive am I? Can I control my emotions? Do I tend to say what I’m thinking when I’m thinking it? Do I judge other people and create conflict? How do others relate to me?
10. Organize your thoughts in a journal. It is one of the best ways to capture what is going on around you and inside you. Make a note of the causal remarks people make about you.
11. Read books and go to seminars that help you rethink your assumptions and address your problem areas and blind spots.
12. Words mean a lot. Your language reflects your thinking and attitudes.

Your thinking and the behavior that flows from that has brought you to where you are now. You are in control of developing the thinking and behavior that will take you where you want to go. Self–awareness is difficult. We don’t always like to admit things about ourselves because we don’t like the guilt associated with not doing what we know we should. But admit we must if we are to grow. Ask yourself, “In light of where I come from, what do I need to know about myself?”

Warren Bennis wrote, “It is one of the paradoxes of life that good leaders rise to the top in spite of their weaknesses, while bad leaders rise because of their weakness….We are our own raw material. Only when we know what we are made of and what we want to make of it can we begin our lives—and we must do it despite an unwitting conspiracy of people and events against us.” It is a lifelong and rewarding journey.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:09 AM
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Where Do You Go to Revitalize Your Standards?

The Parthenon, completed in 432 BC, is one of the world's greatest cultural monuments. The Doric temple was famously designed to counteract the optical illusions created by looking at something so large. To the observer, the columns look perfectly straight and perpendicular, and the steps appear to be horizontally level. This illusion is only possible by exacting architectural corrections.

To account for what the eye sees, every column, instead of being a straight line from base to neck, are actually curved on a slight arc having a gentle swell in the middle or entasis. In addition, the corner columns are slightly larger in diameter than the others and are placed closer to the adjacent column than the distance between each of the other columns. This is due to the fact that the more well-lighted an object is, the smaller it will appear and thus a little further apart than the columns set against the darker background of the building wall.

As the columns rise they are angled towards the center of the temple. Remarkably, the base upon which they rest is curved upwards towards the center so as to make it look horizontally level from a distance. To offset the curvature of the base, the lower drums of the columns are made higher on one side than on the other. Without this correction the columns would lean in opposite directions.

All of the deviations from the vertical and the horizontal made to enhance building's appearance required exacting mathematical calculations. The lines and angles of this geometric structure have been softened into curves so perfectly that they are imperceptible to the observer's eye and harmoniously create the builders vision. Excellence.

Dan Meyer relates the story of an elderly man who returned every few years to the city of Athens for most of his adult life. Each time he would climb to the top of the Acropolis, take a seat on one of its ancient stones and spend an hour or two letting his eyes wander over the massive plateau, reflecting on the soaring columns, and the perfect proportions of the Parthenon. When asked to explain the reason for his habitual behavior, the elderly gentleman’s eyes crinkled as he smiled: “I do this because it keeps my standards high.”

Where do you go for inspiration? Where do your values come from? Where do you go to revitalize your standards?

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:40 PM
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Emotional Intelligence: Self-Awareness

Without self-awareness leadership becomes just another exercise in ego gratification. Self-awareness allows for self-discipline and control of the ego. Without it the ego runs amok looking after itself and only incidentally in the service of others if the needs of both happen to align.

Self-awareness is the ability to see when an emotion or a perception is influencing your thinking and behavior and, if necessary, do something about it. Gaining control over the state of your mind will pay big dividends in terms of your leadership effectiveness. It is the blind spot of leadership. Being able to step back and see both the positive and negative aspects about yourself, to see how you affect others, and to see how you are behaving in real-time, is critical to your success as a leader.

Emotional Intelligence 2.0 offers some good strategies to develop your self-awareness as part of an overall EQ skill development program. Self-awareness is a bigger problem than one might think. The book reports that “only 36 percent of the people tested were able to accurately identify their emotions as they happen. This means that two thirds of us are typically controlled by our emotions and are not yet skilled at spotting them and using them to our benefit.”

A proper and healthy self-awareness facilitates an essential other-awareness that is vital to good leadership. You can not manage the behaviors of others without first getting a handle on your own.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:33 PM
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That's One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for Mankind: An Apollo 11 Lesson

On July 20, 1969, Neil Armstrong and then “Buzz” Aldrin first stepped on to the surface of the moon. Most of the population in the U.S. alive today have no recollection of that event. Yet it is an event that continues to shape the world we live in today. Like many of the great achievements of the past, we don’t and probably can’t fully grasp the effort – problems, ingenuity, perseverance and sense of humor – that went into making the landing on the moon a reality.

The Apollo 11 mission was a success in large part because it was supported by everyone. Not just NASA, but congress and the American people. It was truly a national project. It taught us to work through our unknowns and have faith in our ability to learn and grow.

President John F. Kennedy told an audience at Rice University on September 12, 1962:

We choose to go to the moon in this decade and do the other things, not because they are easy, but because they are hard, because that goal will serve to organize and measure the best of our energies and skills, because that challenge is one that we are willing to accept, one we are unwilling to postpone, and one which we intend to win, and the others, too.

True accomplishments come from doing the hard thing and not resting on the easy things. Raise your expectations. Don’t rob yourself of your potential future. Strive to do the hard things.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:59 PM
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Maxims for Life: You Don’t Have to Learn the Hard Way

Entrepreneur J. R. Parrish has distilled some real world lessons from his own life experience and from the teachings he gained from his mentor at an early age. You Don't Have to Learn the Hard Way is designed as a guide book for young people. In a world haunted by the relative, finding anchors for your life is not as readily available as it should be. Beginning life with a relative mindset is a recipe for disaster. When good advice comes along it is important to take notice of it and see how it fits in with your values and the outcomes you want for yourself.

If you are fortunate enough to find a good mentor to aid you, it’s important to take them seriously if you want to get the full benefit.

Once you find a mentor, it’s essential that you show respect and never become a “Yeah, but.” If your mentor tells you your hair is too long and needs to be cut, do it. Don’t ever say, “Yeah, but I had it short and that didn’t help.” Whatever your mentor suggests, do it and do it immediately if you want him or her to continue to help you. It’s one thing to do what your mentor suggests and report back how it went and quite another to question the advice without trying it. You won’t last long if you resist suggestions.

A mentor or a book like this can help you to gain vicariously what many people end up learning the hard way. Here are several maxims found in Parrish's book that are good to think on:

  Generally speaking, if you’re contradicting, you’re losing.

  Your success or failure will be determined first and foremost by how effectively you deal with others.

  When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.

  Don’t ask a no question if you want a yes answer.

  Most anger distills to blame. When you eliminate blame, you eliminate anger.

  Men and women differ in numerous ways and sometimes make the mistake of treating the other the way they want to be treated.

  If you always do what you say you are going to do, I can build an empire around you; if you sometimes do what you say you’re going to do, you’re just another headache for me.

  What we aren’t taught early in life is the pain and agony that follow selfishness.

  Never say anything about yourself that you don’t want to be true.

  Every facet of life is determined by our thinking, yet we’re not taught how to think.

The book also contains some self-discovery quizzes that are also found on the accompanying web site. Get this book for any young adult you know … and read over their shoulder.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:32 AM
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Will You Survive After Getting to the Next Level?

In The Next Level, Scott Eblin cites research that finds that 40 percent of new executives fail within eighteen months of their promotion. In addition, researchers at Development Dimensions International, conducted a poll of 785 business leaders and found that 40% of managers get little or no support as they enter their new jobs. What begins as one of the best moments in your career can turn out to be one of the most stressful events of your life.

“If success at the next level comes down to just one thing, it may be the art of strategic choice,” writes Eblin. “Making the choice to pick up a new behavior or belief or to let go of one that is no longer serving you requires the capacity to step back and ask yourself, ‘Given what I am trying to do or accomplish, is this serving me?’”

A great question but easier said than done. With a new role comes a new set of expectations requiring a new set of competencies. In other words, what got you here won’t get you there.

Part of the problem faced by newly promoted executives is that while the expectations are high, they are not clearly stated. Considering the inevitable uncertainty and doubt that comes with the territory, it’s not surprising that newly promoted executives easily fall back on practices that no longer serve their interests. Eblin has defined nine set of key behaviors and beliefs that new executives need to pick up and let go of to succeed. “This process of picking up and letting go, I’ve learned, is central to succeeding at the executive level.”

Asking “Given what I am trying to do, is this serving me?” is good advice at any level.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:01 PM
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The Rest of What You Need to Know About Strengths-Based Development

While I don’t believe the core of the strengths-based movement ever intended as its agenda the idea that you only need to "focus on your strengths and ignore your weaknesses," it doesn’t change the fact that that is all most people seem to hear and those that have jumped on the bandwagon, promote. All too often the mantra, “focus on your strengths and ignore your weaknesses” sounds like a Get-Out-of-Jail-Free card. An extreme focus on your strengths (do what you like doing) and delegate your weaknesses (stop doing what you don’t like) plays well, but in reality it can get to be a bit self indulgent. While there is some truth to it, it’s more nuanced than that.

There is no arguing the fact that we all have various combinations of strengths in varying degrees. Maximizing the use of those strengths as we can, in the context we find ourselves in is advantageous to all involved. If you can carve out a place in the world that leverages your strengths that’s great, but the reality is that the world keeps changing and what is required of you to stay relevant – valuable – keeps changing too. You may need to develop a new strength and turn some of your weaknesses around. Then there is the question of whether or not your particular brand of strength is marketable. I may derive pleasure, feel actualized, and be in my zone by utilizing one of my strengths, but if it isn’t competitive with what others are doing with that same strength, well then, I’ll be out of work. Great hobby, but not a career (at least not at my current level of competence).

Robert Kaiser has assembled fifteen authors in The Perils of Accentuating the Positive to help you get some perspective on the strengths movement. Kaiser writes that the point of the book “is not to dismiss strengths-based development.” It’s really a guide to make you a “savvier user of the strengths-based approach” and based on an understanding that “recognizes that both strengths and weaknesses have an appropriate place in learning and development.”

In an interesting analysis by Korn/Ferry of 360 assessments of almost 2000 individuals, they found that most managers don’t have the leadership strengths that their companies need for them to have in order to be effective. The reality is, most people need to develop strengths that don’t come naturally to them. That means if you want to stay competitive – stand out from the crowd – you need to begin now to develop the strengths you don’t have now that are required for your long-term success.

They bring out four ways to look at strengths:

Your Personal Best: What comes naturally to you
Competitive Strengths: Skills that are stronger than most of your competitors
Distinctively Competitive Strengths: Strengths that distinguish you from others
Competitive and Aligned Strengths: Strengths you need for long-term career success

If you plan to succeed by focusing on your strengths, make sure you do more than just discover and build on your strengths (your personal best). You will also need your strengths to stand out compared to your peers (competitive strengths). If you want to stand out among your peers and have a better chance for promotions, make sure your strengths set you apart from other also competitive peers (distinctively competitive strengths). Finally, you better hope that your five distinctive and competitive strengths include the ones that make a difference when it comes to long-term career success (competitive and aligned strengths).

We regularly tell the up-and-coming youngies to first discover their strengths, then gauge how those strengths compare to those of the people they are and will be, competing with, and finally, find out which strengths they need to fulfill their career dreams and to start working on the ones that are not up to par.

As we have stated here before, the overuse of a strength can be a weakness. In addition USC professor Morgan McCall writes, “Strengths that have led to success, the very ones that advocates claim should be played to, can become weaknesses over time or in a new situation.” As our reality changes, we must also change. When we rely too much on our strengths we usually end up emphasizing them to the point where they become weaknesses and derail our career and relationships.

I will say that Marcus Buckingham’s excellent film Trombone Player Wanted does speak eloquently to the tendency to obsess on the negative and systems designed to stifle the development of our strengths and create people that fit a predetermined mold. At the same time, as leaders we do need to be working at placing people in positions where they can play to their strengths as much as possible. All too often people end up in positions that they never wanted or imagined for themselves and really have no business being in. Their effort can only be mediocre at best. We need to utilize our strengths and be proactive in our career and life decisions in an intelligent way. The tempering given to an obsessive strengths-only approach offered in The Perils of Accentuating the Positive helps you do just that.

The bottom line is self awareness and adaptability. There are no shortcuts. Play to your strengths as you can but don’t be over reliant on them. Develop new strengths as required. Fix your liabilities.

Of Related Interest:
  Our Strengths Are Not to Be Indulged, But Managed
  You Can Change
  Changing Your Nature
  I Don’t Like My Strengths. Now What?
  Strengths Based Leadership

Posted by Michael McKinney at 01:35 PM
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Lead, Sell, or Get Out of the Way

Lead, Sell, or Get Out of the Way by Ron Karr provides more evidence that leadership isn’t just about a few titled people at the top. It is a choice to think differently. Leadership is a choice to think differently about anything you do. Selling is no exception and is closely linked to the functions of a leader. Leadership is not always about people we “lead” in the conventional sense, but is frequently about people we must influence. Karr writes, “Whether you sell a product, a service, or an idea, you must be able to influence other people as leaders do.”

It begins with being able to and understanding the need to engage others in continuous strategic conversations as part of the normal way of doing things—a process Karr has termed Integrated Dialogue. Integrated dialogue is a conversation of shared purpose that draws people out “to create a powerful relationship, one that identifies whole new zones of mutual opportunity, addresses far-ranging issues, and positions you as an invaluable resource: a leader.”

As with all leaders, sales people too will succeed when they fully appreciate the many relationships inherent in their success. Sales leaders lead a whole cast of people in their own organizations from the customer service, tech people to accounting and senior management. In addition they lead not only their customer or end user but also many points of contact in their customer’s organization that are likely to have some input on the buying decision like operations, accounting, purchasing and senior management. Gone are the days where everything filters through the salesperson. “Your success as a salesperson depends on your ability to build and sustain coalitions both inside and outside your organization. You must create and lead the coalition, no matter what you are selling.” This will resonate with any leader:

Your job is to manage multiple constituencies and alliances, and to use those alliances to identify new and better ways of generating the desired results. Your job is to do what most salespeople don’t do: lead the conversation with your prospects and customers about the results they need, the problems they have, and the obstacles they face.

To make this happen you must possess and develop the belief that you have everything you need and can build on that, the belief that you can improve any area of your life, everything is possible, preparation maximizes your potential, and your customers—the people you need to influence—come first.

After laying the groundwork, Karr defines and explains the seven traits that great sales leaders share:

• Visualize: Begin with the end in mind
• Position: First impressions lay the foundation for the entire relationship
• Build Alliances: They reach out; sales leaders leverage their influence
• Ask Good Questions: Sales leaders ask powerful questions that uncover opportunities to enhance customer outcomes and results
• Create Powerful Value Propositions: They create and deliver a powerful value proposition based on a simple formula that is based on both tangible and intangible incentives that motivate buyers to take action
• Communicate Persuasively: They inspire action in others by delivering messages that are congruent with the larger purpose
• Hold Themselves Accountable: Personal accountability matters. People are accountable to other people—not organizations

Karr demonstrates how to move from task-oriented selling (which is what most salespeople do) to purpose-oriented selling. These principles are worth bearing in mind on a personal development level as well. Karr encourages, “The bottom line is that you have the ability to increase your sphere of influence and sales just by the way you act toward those you are trying to influence.” Change your conversations, change your outcomes. Leaders in any field will find much here to assimilate into their daily activities. Read it and grow.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:15 AM
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Are You Dealing With Insecurity?

We all harbor some insecurity; even if it’s just trying to hide the fact that we do. But it is not something we can ignore. Too much insecurity can cripple our leadership and anyone we lead.

In Building Your Leadership Resume, president of the Southern Baptist Convention and pastor Johnny Hunt outlines nine characteristics of an insecure leader:

•  An insecure leader has a hard time giving credit to others. “Why should praise seem like an unrecoverable cost? It is a gift that gives back to everyone.”

•  An insecure leader keeps information from his staff. “When you release information, you convey trust and confidence to others. When you conceal it, you convey just the opposite: no trust, no confidence.”

•  An insecure leader doesn’t want his staff exposed to other leaders—people who may possess qualities you don’t, people who may have skills your staff wishes you had. “When one person grows the whole team grows….Give your people the best—even better than you are.”

•  An insecure leader is often a micromanager. “He’s a control freak.” Nothing can happen that they are not fully aware of. They fear things will fall apart without them. This kind of oppressive control can wring the life out of your team.

•  Insecure leaders are too needy of praise. “For this reason, more than perhaps any other, they can’t really be leaders. When someone needs his followers to always be telling him how wonderful he is, he works in direct opposition to the heartbeat of leadership, which is: building into other’s lives.”

•  Insecure leaders don’t provide security for those they lead. “If the mood and environment in the office is one of fear, second-guessing, and self-doubt, you can be sure an insecure leader is in charge.”

•  Insecure leaders take more than they give. Instead of validating and encouraging others, they are focused on receiving it.

•  Insecure leaders limit their best leaders. “Insecure leaders cannot genuinely celebrate the victories won by others.”

•  Insecure leaders limit their organization. “Not only does insecurity throttle down the horsepower of individual team members; it results in putting restraints on the whole church or organization.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:37 AM
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Confusing Principles and Approaches

In How the Mighty Fall, Jim Collins makes a case for why the fall of previously great companies does not negate prior research:

The principles in Good to Great were derived primarily from studying specific periods in history when the good-to-great companies showed a substantial transformation into an era of superior performance that lasted fifteen years. The research did not attempt to predict which companies would remain great after their fifteen-year run. Indeed, as this work shows, even the mightiest of companies can self-destruct.

Of course, the same is true of the classic by Tom Peters and Bob Waterman, In Search of Excellence. The failure or declining performance of some people and organizations does not negate the basic message. It is part of being human to get ourselves off-course—even when we know better. The failure of the exemplary companies to maintain their hold on greatness or excellence does however hold an important lesson for us. It’s all too easy to move away from our core values. They are always under fire and it takes courage to hold the course. Everything we do has to be continually reviewed and realigned to our core values.

As you know, knowing the right thing to do and doing it are two different issues. More to the point, doing the right thing once and doing it consistently over time in the face of circumstances that would derail us, is a matter of character.

We depart from our core values over time for all kinds of reasons. Doing the right thing doesn’t always give us an immediate payoff in the way we typically gauge success. Doing the right thing is often its own reward. In time, life happens to us and changes our thinking and encourages compromise. Comparing ourselves to others creates doubt. Cynicism is always at the door demanding a hearing and makes sense in a world that rarely works according to plan; a world that is seemingly more irrational than rational. Life changes our friends and they influence us too. All of these circumstances conspire to make us grow or self-destruct. It’s a choice we make every day.

This leads us to a cautionary note. In the search for timeless and universal principles that can be applied in any organization, you will frequently find confusion between principles and approaches. Principles are timeless and universal, but approaches are not. Humility is a timeless and universal principle. The Hedgehog Concept is an approach and therefore is not timeless or universal. The approach has been around since recorded time, but is contextual. It will work in some situations and not in others. Approaches change. Principles do not. Principles speak to matters of thinking and behavior that go beyond the moment and to a higher purpose. Approaches are tools. Principles give us meaning. It’s best not to confuse the two.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:02 AM
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The Four Roles of Mentors

In The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything, Ken Robinson writes that mentors serve us in one or all of the following ways:

Recognition. “I don’t know of any test or software program that can make the kinds of subtle, personal distinctions that differentiate an interest from a burning passion. A mentor who has already found the Element in a particular discipline can do precisely that. Mentors recognize the spark of interest or delight and can help an individual drill down to the specific components of the discipline that match that individual’s capacity and passion.”

Encouragement. “Mentors lead us to believe that we can achieve something that seemed improbable or impossible to us before we meant them.”

Facilitating. “Mentors can help lead us toward our Element by offering us advice and techniques, paving the way for us, and even allowing us to falter a bit while standing by to help us recover and learn from our mistakes.”

Stretching. “Effective mentors push us past what we see as our limits. Much as they don’t allow us to succumb to self-doubt, the also prevent us from doing less with our lives than we can.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:49 AM
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Find Your Tribe. Find Your Passion.

Ken Robinson calls the place where the things we love to do and the things we are good at come together, the Element. Illustrated by stories, many based on exclusive interviews, of celebrities, entrepreneurs, scientists, and other highly accomplished people who have found the Element, Robinson’s book The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything is an engaging and motivating resource.

Connecting with people who share our same passions and commitment helps in developing our Element. This is our tribe. “Often we need other people to help us recognize our real talents. Often we can help other people to discover theirs.”

Robinson says that for many people, finding your tribe is essential in helping you to find your Element. “Finding your tribe can have transformative effects on your sense of identity and purpose. This is because of three powerful tribal dynamics: validation, inspiration, and what we’ll call here the ‘alchemy of synergy.’”

Validation: It’s not just me. Although you may be most in your element when you are working alone, “there’s a tacit awareness of a field – the other writers, other painters, other mathematicians, other players, who enrich the domain and challenge their sense of possibility.” Physicist John wheeler said, “If you don’t kick things around with people, you are out of it. Nobody, I always say, can be anybody without somebody being around.”

Inspiration: How do they do that? “Members of a passionate community tend to drive each other to explore the real extent of their talents…. Tribes are circles of influence, and they can take many forms…. When tribes gather in the same place, the opportunities for mutual inspiration can become intense.”

Alchemy of synergy: The power of tribes is exemplified in the synergy created when groups of people with similar interests come together and create something much greater than any one of them could create individually. Robinson attributes this to the fact that creative teams are diverse, dynamic and distinct or purposeful.

Robinson says that tribe membership “helps people become more themselves, leading them toward a greater sense of personal identity.”

Finding your Element is not always easy. Fear is the most common obstacle standing between you and your passion. “These fears include the fear of failure, the fear of not being good enough, the fear of being found wanting, the fear of disapproval, the fear of poverty, and the fear of the unknown. You may also find that your background has never given you the opportunity to discover or explore your Element in the first place. You also have to face the impact of the image and expectations that other have of you have of you that put pressure on you to pursue a different path.

If you are looking to find or develop your passion – your Element – Robinson’s book is a carefully reasoned and practical guide to help you find the best in you. At the very least, it will make you think differently about yourself.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:26 PM
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Three Good Habits For Life and Investing From Jim Rogers

Investor Jim Rogers has collected his advice for success in life in A Gift to My Children: A Fathers’ Lesson for Life and Investing. Using examples from his life, this inspiring book makes a good quick read for anyone. Here is a good example from a chapter that offers three good habits for life and investing:

Be a Self-Starter. When Rogers was young he got a job with Mr. Booker, a local home builder. “At first, I couldn’t even hammer a nail straight, and the men on the job weren’t shy about pointing this out. But when we were awaiting deliveries of building materials or had nothing to do, I’d gather up the scrap lumber or sweep up the sawdust or whatever else I could find. ‘Say what you want,’ the contractor told them, ‘but this kid never stops. He has the right attitude, he has the proper approach, and I want him working for me.’ Eventually I did learn to drive nails as quickly as anyone, dig foundations, install roofs, and all the other skills necessary to do the job. If it weren’t for my work ethic, I might never have gotten the chance.”

Attention To Details Is What Separates Success From Failure. “In investing, as in life, the small details often spell the difference between success and failure. So you must be attentive! However trivial it may seem, you must research and check each and every piece of information you need to make a decision. Leave no questions or nagging feelings of uncertainty uninvestigated. The most common reason why people do not succeed is that their research is faulty or limited to the confines of what is immediately available. Only through meticulous research will you obtain the knowledge necessary for success. It requires abundant work and diligence, but the effort will give you a distinct advantage over your competitors.”

Live Your Life With a Dream. “When you begin something, you may not always have a concrete picture or vision of he future. But if you continue to be passionate and work hard at what you truly love to do, then you will eventually find that dream. Which may morph into yet another dream. And another.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 04:03 PM
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Are You a Perfectionist or an Optimalist?

Being happy or being perfect. You can have one, but you can’t have the other. The happy life is attainable, but the perfect life isn’t. In fact, trying to be perfect gets in the way of being happy (and productive). Imperfection is a by-product if being human.

Perfectionism – the maladaptive and neurotic belief that you and/or your environment must be perfect and that work or output that is anything less than perfect is unacceptable – is not something that you are born with. It is developed. Contrary to the goal they seek, perfectionists are focused on failure.

There’s a difference between setting high standards that spur us on and seeking perfection that demoralizes us. In The Pursuit of Perfect, author Tal Ben-Shahar refers to the two approaches as perfectionism and optimalism. Most of us are a little of both. “We may be Optimalists in some areas of our lives and Perfectionists in others. For example, we may be quite forgiving of mistakes we or others make on the job but be thrown into despair when our expectations are not fully met in our relationships.” Consider these statements:

The key difference between the Perfectionist and the Optimalist is that the former essentially rejects reality while the latter accepts it.

While the Perfectionist rejects failure, the Optimalist accepts it as a natural part of life and as an experience that is inextricably linked to success.

The Perfectionist believes that a happy life comprises an uninterrupted stream of positive emotions. And because he, of course, aspires to be happy, he rejects painful emotions…. The Optimalist, on the other hand, accepts that painful emotions are an inevitable part of being alive.

The perfectionist is never satisfied. She consistently sets goals and standards that are for all intents and purposes impossible to meet, thereby from the outset rejecting the possibility of success…. The Optimalist also sets extremely high standards, but her standards are attainable because they are grounded in reality. When she meets her goals, she appreciates her successes and takes time to experience gratitude for her accomplishments.

Perfectionist reject reality and replace it with a fantasy world – a world in which there is no failure and no painful emotions and in which their standards for success, no matter how unrealistic, can actually be met. Optimalists accept reality – they accept that in the real world some failure and sorrow is inevitable and that success has to be measured against standards that are actually attainable.

Ben-Shahar discusses these ideas in detail and then shows how they apply to and play out in education, the workplace and in relationships. He offers exercise and meditation to help you reorient your thinking and move from perfectionist thinking to optimalist thinking.

It’s easy to see from his approach and the advice given in this book, why his Harvard course in “Positive Psychology,” is the most popular class in the university’s history. Read it. I’m certain you’ll benefit.

*  *  *
  How do you know if you're a perfectionist? Psychology Today offers a self-test on their web site.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:33 AM
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10 Survival Tips from Donald Trump

What's happened to the economy has been likened to a tsunami as well as an implosion. When the undersea earthquake and subsequent tsunami hit in Indonesia in 2004, the world was stunned by the devastation that took place. It triggered earthquakes around the globe as far away as Alaska. It happened in a very short amount of time. This kind of event takes shape over a period of time and then erupts with incredible force. What happened this past year is similar in that respect -- it'd been brewing for some time. When it hit, it was like a tsunami which caused other economies to start crumbling as well. We are all familiar with that scenario. What we need to do now is deal with it.

The aftermath of a tsunami requires surveying the damage, picking up the pieces and moving on. Some people have bigger losses than others, but everyone has to keep going.

When it comes to implosion, it's more of a cave-in than a wipe-out, but equally potent. We saw the effects of an implosion watching the towers fall on 9/11. It's a domino effect. We won't sink because we can swim, but let's not go the way of dominos. Let's be smart and learn to think for ourselves in positioning ourselves for what comes next. Here are a few survival tips:

• Pay attention to national and international news and finance coverage at least several times a day, preferably hourly. In volatile times, vigilance is necessary.
• Absorb, assess, and then act. Knowledge without action is impotence.
• When a tsunami hits, there's no time for procrastination. Keep your momentum in tune with the times.
• Avoid your comfort zone -- it's probably outdated anyway.
• If you're honest, you should know the questions that should be asked, as well as the answers. That's probably why there's so much confusion out there today.
• Remember The Blitz. That can put things into perspective. Things may be tough and getting tougher, but we're not being bombed day in and day out either. If you don't know what The Blitz is, use your time wisely to study WWII to find out.
• Is your life half empty or half full? Half is better than zip. Count your blessings.
• Realize that fear is the exact opposite of faith.
• Resolve to be bigger than your problems. Who's the boss?
• Don't negate your own power. Whatever you've been dealt, know you can deal with it.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 01:12 AM
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Think Like a Champion: Lessons From Donald Trump

Donald Trump enjoys teaching. He sees it as another side of his nature and is devoting more time to it as evidenced by his many books and Trump University.

Think Like a Champion: An Informal Education In Business and Life is a collection of short essays that illuminate Trump’s thinking and approach to business and life. He is reflective and as usual, candid.

What keeps Trump relevant is his passion for learning. He writes, “It’s important to remain open to new ideas and new information. Being a know-it-all is like shutting the door to great discoveries and opportunities. Keep your door open every day to something new and energizing.” It’s a theme he weaves throughout this book. Here are several lessons from Trump’s Think Like a Champion:

We don’t really create, but we assemble what has been created for us. Be a great assembler—no matter what your interests may be—and you’ll be on your way to inventiveness.

Considering the availability of news, blind spots can’t really be rationalized anymore, no matter where you might be living. Information is available to everyone, and if you aren’t plugging into it, it will eventually work against you—maybe on your first interview. Don’t learn this the hard way.

Do not allow fear to settle into place in any part of your life. It is a defeating attitude and a negative emotion. Recognize and zap it immediately. Replace it with a problem-solving attitude, faith in yourself, and hard work.

Momentum is something you have to work at to maintain. Find your own current and then go with it! Don’t allow for distractions. Do everything you can to maintain your energy flow. Watch out for streaks of momentum that you can’t sustain—keep your equilibrium in all things, even in your energy output.

I always ask myself, “Is this a blip, or a catastrophe?”—it gives me a point of reason in the midst of bad news. Your problems can be temporary if you keep your momentum moving forward. We all experience difficulties, but they can be blips if you remain positive and move on.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 01:03 AM
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Emotional Intelligence – How To Get It

Corporate psychologist Martyn Newman says that “being intelligent about your emotions is critical to your success as a leader. If leadership is ultimately the art of accomplishing extraordinary things through ordinary people, then building emotional capital is how you achieve it.”

Competence will only get you so far. You need emotional intelligence to implement your ideas. In his book Emotional Capitalists, he writes that today’s leaders must focus on emotional capital. That is, “the energy, the enthusiasm and commitment in the hearts of everyone connected with the business.”

The idea of emotional intelligence was popularized by Daniel Goleman and it is given form in this EI toolkit. Newman offers practical guidance to how it is developed and applied.

He categorizes the emotional intelligence of effective leaders into five broad components: Self-awareness, Self-management, Social awareness, Social skills and Adaptability. These are skills that can be developed by anyone motivated to do so. There are ten competencies associated with these components, but there are seven that he has isolated that he has found to absolutely essential for leaders to focus on. They are:

Self-Reliance: “Being self-reliant does not mean that you just go out and do your own thing. It means being secure enough in yourself to turn to others and take into account different points of view while regarding yourself as finally responsible for working out what has to be said or done.”

Assertiveness: It’s not about being aggressive or passive but it’s about “being able to communicate your message honestly and directly, while respecting the fact that others may hold a different opinion or expectation.” It requires clear communications and self-control.

Optimism: “Individuals and organizations who view their setbacks in the context of progress are much more likely to continue in their efforts towards success.”

Self-Actualization: This is the power behind sustained high performance. Passion. “Passion is an emotional competency you can develop by focusing your attention on your discontent – what you are unhappy with or what you’d like to do better – and then cultivating a vision of how things could be different.”

Self-Confidence: “Solid self-confidence is important because it is the platform that supports your ability to respond actively and positively to value-creating opportunities.” Building self-confidence is the starting point for unlocking the potential of yourself and others.

Relationship Skills: “Why would you want to perform at your best when you don’t feel leadership is genuinely interested in you as a person?”

Empathy: It is about “demonstrating that you can see the world from another person’s point of view.”

Newman shows how you can develop each of these competencies and how you can deal with some of the toxic behaviors and thinking that you may have acquired over the years. It is a very helpful book that also offers readers an opportunity to take the Emotional Capital Inventory to measure your personal level of emotional capital. Check it out!

* * *
While we are on the topic, Jossey-Bass released in paperback two essential volumes on social skills and common sense: Social Intelligence: The New Science of Success and Practical Intelligence: The Art and Science of Common Sense. Management consultant Karl Albrecht deftly illuminates these topics with such great stories, examples and humor that you will find them not just a great read but you will quickly identify with the ideas he is presenting with your own experiences. The insights contained in these books are immediately applicable in your relationships on and off the playing field.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:30 PM
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Strategic Presence: The Power that Fuels Leadership

Tony Jeary, author of Strategic Acceleration: Succeed at the Speed of Life, is a coach to some of the world's top CEOs. In his book he brings together practical ideas to help you get out of your own way. A critical aspect of getting things done through others is presence – your presence. To influence others you need to know how they perceive you and adjust your communication with them accordingly. Here, Tony discusses what he calls strategic presence:

The goal of leadership is to produce superior results on purpose and that makes leadership a results contest. The challenge of leadership is to persuade and motivate those they lead to produce the results they want. When people voluntarily and enthusiastically do what their leaders ask them to do and the desired results are achieved, leaders are considered to be effective and successful! The question is how do leaders really get others to voluntarily and enthusiastically produce the desired results? There are many parts to this puzzle, but there is none greater than a condition I describe as Strategic Presence.

Here is a great story that illustrates Strategic Presence and also illuminates its effect. A student from a foreign country was enrolled in the middle of a school year. During the first day of class, the other kids in the class were doing what kids do. There was a lot of giggling and staring and posturing for the new arrival. The new student was dressed in a way that did not meet the expectations of a few of the other children and eventually one of them (the class clown) began to make jokes about the new student's appearance.

As the scene was progressing toward chaos, the teacher was about to intervene when a girl stood up and told everyone to stop picking on their new classmate. The girl reminded them that it was scary to be new in a school and they needed to be kind to the student and make them feel welcome She reminded them they should treat this new person as they would want to be treated if they were in a new country and a new school. After class, the teacher called the girl aside and said, "That was a very brave thing you did. Why did you do that?" The girl replied, "Because that is what my Mom and Dad would expect me to do!"

This story powerfully illustrates the essence and the effect of what I call Strategic Presence. The girl had merely done what she knew her parents would want her to do. Her parents had succeeded in creating a positive presence in her mind, which gave her the willingness and courage to do what she did. Most importantly, the presence of her parents was so authentic that they did not have to be physically present to inspire their daughter's good behavior.

Leaders create impressions that exist in the mind of every person they lead. It is a presence that defines the perceptions people have of their leaders and what they believe about them. It is this overall persona that I am referring to when I use the term Strategic Presence and there are two types: Positive and Negative. Leaders are constantly creating and presenting images of influence that produce both.

The most important fact about Strategic Presence is that it produces two possible reactions in others. It either produces voluntary cooperation or it produces various forms of resistance. If leaders generate positive Strategic Presence, people will be more likely to support what they want, most of the time. However, if perceptions of leadership are negative people will substitute resistance for cooperation. The possibilities of how people will respond to Strategic Presence are limited to cooperation or resistance. There is not much middle ground between them. As someone once said, "you are either for us against us!" It is easy to see why creating an authentic, positive strategic presence is critical for the execution of a vision.

Creating positive Strategic Presence is not a strategy of manipulation. The positive strategic presence leaders project must be authentic. Failing the test of authenticity means the very image leadership hopes to establish will be perceived as deceptive and disingenuous, or worse. People are very perceptive and they will see through efforts to project a phony persona for the purposes of manipulating their behavior. So, why shouldn't a leader's strategic presence just be allowed to be what it is?" That is a great question and the answer is simple. Many leaders are misunderstood and create perceptions that really don't match their intent. So, understanding how Strategic Presence is created will minimize the possibility of being misunderstood.

So, how is strategic presence is created? What are the things about leadership that speaks the loudest about it? What creates the perceptions that combine to produce Strategic Presence? There are two components that contribute to strategic presence: values and behavior.

Our values are established by what we believe to be right, wrong, true, false, acceptable, unacceptable, appropriate and inappropriate. Let's face it, we have all developed deep, strong opinions about many things as we live our lives. Our opinions spring forth from your values and your values influence what we actually do.

Our values and beliefs impact 5 categories of that drive our behavior, and it is our behavior that creates Strategic Presence. The five categories that drive behavior are:

1. Work ethic
2. Integrity
3. Judgment
4. Courage
5. Willingness to help others

So, if you want to be a great leader, you need to have great values and your values must be demonstrated in the action you take. This is the essence of Strategic Presence and it is truly the power that fuels leadership.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 05:54 PM
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Take the Greater Than Yourself Challenge

You’ve heard “invest yourself in others” and “pay it forward.” Steve Farber has his own unique twist on these ideas and he calls it Greater Than Yourself.

The Greater Than Yourself (GTY) concept is based on the premise that great leaders become great because they cause others to be greater than they are. GTY is a one-on-one development process where you choose to help someone become more capable, competent, and accomplished than you are. It has three parts to it: Expand Yourself, Give Yourself and Replicate Yourself.

The life-long process begins with you. “You have to expand yourself before you can help make others greater.” That means that you have to make sure that everything that is you is constantly expanding. No matter how much you think you know or are, “you can always learn more, you can always experience more, you can always connect more and love more.” The point of which is to give it all away.

Giving it all away always brings out the cynics. But Farber deals with that too. Giving it all away seems to imply subtraction – like a zero-sum-game – to many people. But it’s not. Giving it all away really adds to who you are. Parents get it, but when we get outside that relationship, an improper self-interest kicks in and we miss the bigger picture.

In this business fable set along the California coast, Faber skillfully explains the true nature of giving it all away to become a creator of masters. GTY has life changing possibilities if you commit to it. Expanding yourself “is a practice that should become part of your life. Integrate it into your thought process and into the way you make decisions. Will X add to your inventory? Will it expand an item that is already there? If so, do it; if not, don’t.”

When you think of giving of yourself, money may not be part of it. You have other resources like “your talent, your knowledge, your connections, your confidence, your trust” and last but not least, “your time.”

In the end you want to replicate yourself. That is, you want to make sure that the people you elevate are doing the same for others.

In an organizational context, it might look like this: “Everyone on my team and in our company should become significantly greater as a result of working with one another.” But, “I’m not trying to hire people who are more talented than me, I’m trying to hire people with heart, desire, drive and mad potential, and then encourage all of them to bring out the best in one another by giving fully to one another. See the difference?”

Farber admits that this isn’t easy to do initially. In response, he challenges us to pick just one person to make a GTY project. “Raise that person; boost him or her above yourself. Start there and see what happens.”

He has created a web site with examples and resources to get you going. In particular, there is a four minute video of a GTY project conducted by the Up With People organization, that is a good overview of what this is all about and the impact it can have. The participants in this GTY project don’t rule out that great things can come in small packages. The tendency is to pick someone who is already doing well and then working to make them greater; jump on their bandwagon so to speak. There’s certainly nothing wrong in that, but perhaps the most impact can come from taking someone who really needs a leg up and connecting them to what they need.

Take the Greater Than Yourself Challenge. Pick one person and give of yourself to make their life better—than yours!

u > i

Posted by Michael McKinney at 04:23 PM
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Procrastination: THE Results Killer!

Tony Jeary is a coach to the world's top CEOs and high achievers and is the author of a very practical book, Strategic Acceleration: Succeed at the Speed of Life. When we look at the work before us, it’s easy to procrastinate. Jeary suggest we are focusing on the wrong thing. “To avoid procrastination and get faster results,” he writes, “focus on starting instead of finishing, then adjust as you go.” He offers this helpful outlook on procrastination:

Anyone interested in getting better results, becoming more productive and ultimately more successful should probably take an honest look at the problem of procrastination. Most people think procrastination is just an issue that involves putting things off that can be done later without much of a penalty. That idea just scratches the surface of the procrastination issue and is indicative of the denial people have about it. Truthfully, procrastination is like an addiction because it is the symptom of a thinking problem and like any other addiction, its difficult to break! The reality is this: Nothing marginalizes results more than procrastination because being productive and getting superior results is about completing tasks and projects in reduced time frames.

Obviously, if you can get more work done in less time, you will see results much faster. We are all guilty of procrastination to some extent, and there are two kinds:

1. Positive Procrastination. This is when you legitimately need some "mental percolation" time to gather your thoughts and get clear on what you need to do.
2. Negative Procrastination. This is based on some pretty flimsy excuses to avoid doing something, which will ultimately affect your results in negative ways.

Whereas Positive Procrastination can be beneficial, Negative Procrastination is something you need to overcome in order to be more effective and finish things faster. You can't produce results until you start doing something. If you do nothing, that is exactly what you will get -- nothing!

If you want to accelerate results, there is no room in your life or your business for Negative Procrastination. Show me a person who consistently gets less than stellar results, and I'll show you a person who procrastinates. However, they probably won't think of themselves as procrastinators because they have lots of seemingly good reasons for not doing things TODAY.

You may find some of the following statements familiar. You have probably either heard them from other people, or you may have even believed one or more of them yourself. If you feel a personal kinship with these statements, I suggest that you give serious thought to the possibility that there might be a touch of procrastination in your own life. Consider the following statements:

1. "I can do it tomorrow." This may be the most popular and frequently used justification for procrastination. The reason it's so popular is because tomorrow sounds so close to today. Waiting until tomorrow just doesn't seem like that big a deal. Just waiting one more day won't upset too many people, and there are surely many good reasons that can be created to justify the delay.
2. "I don't have everything I need, so I'll wait." This is a very popular statement used to justify inaction and waiting. It is most often an excuse that salespeople use to avoid making telephone calls to prospects. The truth is that you can always take some kind of action, regardless of the list of the things you think you need before you can start. All you have to do is be honest about it and look for what is possible to do today. Do not wait until you have everything you think you need before you start doing things.
3. "I can't do it perfectly, so I'll wait." This excuse doesn't make much sense if you ask yourself the question: Can we ever do anything perfectly? I think not. How do you feel about this statement? Do you feel as though you have to be able to perform perfectly before you can be willing to act? If you do have this attitude, you are in serious trouble, because you will NEVER be able to do anything perfectly.
4. "I don't have time right now." Why and how do we get the idea that we have to be able to finish something before we can work on it? Let me use a book-writing example to show you what I mean by this. A non-fiction book is a collection of chapters. Each chapter is a collection of ideas about a specific topic. Each idea may have many sub-points. When I begin a book project, how many books would I complete if I believed I had to finish the entire book in one, continuous work session? The answer is that I would never complete any book project if I believed this was necessary. The correct approach is to do what you can, when you can!
5. "Someone else can do it better." This excuse is a silent one that people make to themselves privately. Some authors and psychologists say that procrastination is rooted in the fear of success. I'm not a psychologist, but I think it's more likely people fear failure more than they fear success. Let's face it -- people don't want to look bad, and they are hesitant to put themselves in position where they might fail. Procrastination is a tool that many people use because they falsely believe it will save them from failure. The truth is that procrastination usually guarantees failure.

Procrastination may be many things, but mostly it's a bad habit. Someone once said, "Repetition strengthens and confirms." Simply put, this means that the more you do something, the easier it gets! I believe people learn how to procrastinate over a long period of time, and the more they do it, the easier it becomes. So, if you want better results and greater success, take a look at the issue of procrastination in your life. Sit down today and make a list of all the things you need to do that you have not completed. How many are the result of procrastination? You might be surprised.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:34 AM
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One More Time: Resilience is Key

In The Knack, a book for entrepreneurs, Norm Broadsky and Bo Burlingham respond to the question, “What does it take to be a successful entrepreneur?” The most important quality is resilience. “I’m talking about the ability to bounce back from failure, to turn around a bad situation, to profit from your mistakes. They continue:

That’s because everybody makes mistakes, plenty of them. What’s more, we keep making them as long as we’re in business. Sure, we like to think we’ll eventually get so smart we won’t make mistakes anymore. Forget about it. You’ll never stop making mistakes. Hopefully, the new ones won’t be the same as the old ones, but they’ll be equally painful. They’ll bug you just as much. They’ll make you just as mad. As upset as you get, however, it’s important to bear in mind that failure is still the best teacher around. You’ll do fine as long as you’re open to the lessons it’s trying to teach you.

And a concluding thought from an article in the New York Times, Innovation Should Mean More Jobs, Not Less. Geoffrey A. Moore, author of Dealing with Darwin, comments:

America is probably the best culture in the world at failing,” he said. “We’re willing to navigate in a fog and keep moving forward. Our competitive advantage tends to be at the fuzzy front end of things when you’re still finding your way. Once the way has been found, we’re back at a disadvantage.

Related Interest:
  When Rooted In Hard Work and Experience, Resilience Is Better Than Any Crystal Ball

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:29 AM
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Strengths Based Leadership

The fact is, many leaders do not really know their strengths. Not only does this lack of self-awareness bring about unintended consequences to one’s behavior, but also it can lead to disengaged employees and undue stress in the workplace and beyond. Donald Clifton remarked:

What great leaders have in common is that each truly knows his or her strengths – and can call on the right strength at the right time. This explains why there is no definitive list of characteristics that describes all leaders.

In Strengths Based Leadership, authors Tom Rath and Barry Conchie present a new leadership version of Gallup’s StrengthsFinder assessment. (An access code is included with the book so you can take the new assessment online.) The assessment is design to help you see how your top five strengths fit into their newly identified four domains of leadership strengths: Executing strengths, Influencing Strengths, Relationship Building strengths and Strategic Thinking strengths. You will find that this knowledge is useful in creating well-rounded teams. As they note, "Although individuals need not be well-rounded, teams should be."

Unique to this book, is a study of 10,000 followers. When they asked them why they followed, four basic wants and needs emerged: trust, compassion, stability and hope. Once you have identified your strengths, they will give you specific suggestions for meeting those needs.

The idea of strengths based leadership is not to ignore your weaknesses as some have mistakenly misunderstood. But the emphasis for any leader should be a deep understanding of what they bring to the table and not trying to be something they are not. Rath and Conchie write:

The most effective leaders know better than to try to be someone they are not. Whenever they spot an opportunity, they reinvest in their strengths…. Leaders stay true to who they are – and then make sure they have the right people around them. Those who surround themselves with similar personalities will always be at a disadvantage in the long run to those who are secure enough in themselves to enlist partners with complementary strengths.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:46 PM
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When Rooted In Hard Work and Experience, Resilience Is Better Than Any Crystal Ball

In separating Booz Allen Hamilton into two companies this year, Chairman & Chief Executive Officer Ralph W. Shrader gained a valuable lesson and has presented us with an interesting perspective in a speech he delivered earlier this year. He states, “I’m absolutely convinced that separating our firm was inevitable—and that it was the right thing for our institution, our clients, and our people. But, I certainly never envisioned this path when I became Chairman & CEO in 1999 or when I joined Booz Allen 35 years ago.” The following remarks are edited from this speech.

There’s a well-worn saying that “I wish I knew then, what I know now.” But, I beg to differ. I’m glad I didn’t know then that we would end up taking this path. That’s a key lesson that this experience crystallized for me.

The lesson is this: Don’t tell me the future. I’ve learned, unquestionably, that resilience—not prophecy—is the greatest gift. Now, that idea runs counter to human nature and desire. Seeking to know the future has been man’s eternal quest—from ancient mythology to the 21st century (and into the 24th century if judged by Star Trek episodes).

Astrology aside, modern forecasting techniques are widely employed in science and business. Clearly, it can save lives and fortunes to be able to predict weather patterns, epidemics, and financial markets. (No question, we have a long way to go in telling the future of financial markets!) But, it’s important to recognize the limits of even the most sophisticated models and forecasting methods—and to rely on them as tools, not oracles.

I’m convinced that prophecy would be a curse, not a gift, in our most important human endeavors, from corporate strategy to national destiny to personal relationships.

I firmly believe knowing the future could severely limit our vision, passion, and potential. It could cause us to take things for granted… or to give up hope. Much more than prophecy, resilience—the ability to rise to the occasion and opportunity, whatever the future may bring—is the far greater gift. And, it’s also a gift we can reasonably attain.

Resilience is optimistic opportunism. Its power can be seen in the prescient observation that “Things turn out the best for those who make the best of the way things turn out.” Think about that: “Things turn out the best for those who make the best of the way things turn out.”

When rooted in hard work and experience, resilience is better than any crystal ball. I think—I hope—we’re coming to understand that we don’t need to know the future. We can be confident that our performance and resilience will enable us to succeed and control our destiny.

And, that’s the thought I’d like to leave you with: While we can’t know our destiny (and I’ve come to believe we shouldn’t want to), we do have a large measure of control over our destiny, as individuals and as institutions. What gives us this control? Hard work, experience, and resilience.

There’s no question that hard work, focused on a goal, is never wasted—even if the destination changes. The experience, expertise, and discipline we gain is invaluable and will lead to success, as long as we have the resilience—the optimistic opportunism—to sense the winds of change and go with them.

There’s a Japanese proverb that says, “Even the fortune-tellers do not know their own destiny.” I’m convinced we have more control over our destiny by not knowing it—as long as we strive for excellence and have the resilience to make the best of the way things turn out.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:57 AM
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John Bogle on What is Enough

We are about to begin a new year that is bursting with faith in hope. Whether that faith is justified remains to be seen. Yet you would be handicapping yourself if you did not read and reflect on John Bogle’s tour de force, Enough: True Measures of Money, Business and Life.

The book is a result of a fair amount of reflection by Bogle himself. He offers a critique of American society today and asks what is or should be "enough" in money, in business, and in life. It is a book about character. He writes that “not knowing what enough is subverts our professional values” and leads us astray in life in general. “We too often bow down at the altar of the transitory and finally meaningless and fail to cherish what is beyond calculation, indeed eternal.” Not having grasped the concept of enough, we have seen the “subversion of our character and values.”

We live in a time that values achievement over character. When the two collide, character often takes a back seat and relationships of all kinds are shattered. Bogle observes that while the financial represents the worst of it, what we see today is not just a financial sector problem, but a societal problem. There is really just too much greed everywhere.

He laments that we rely on numbers to give us facts that are really not facts:

As I have earlier noted, the most important things in life and in business can’t be measured. The trite bromide “If you can measure it, you can manage it” has been a hindrance in the building a great real-world organization, just as it has been a hindrance in evaluating the real-world economy. It is character, not numbers, that make the world go ‘round. How can we possibly measure the qualities of human existence that give our lives and careers meaning? How about grace, kindness, and integrity? What value do we put on passion, devotion, and trust? How much do cheerfulness, the lilt of a human voice, and a touch of pride add to our lives? Tell me, please, if you can, how to value friendship, cooperation, dedication, and spirit. Categorically, the firm that ignores the intangible qualities that the human beings who are our colleagues bring to their careers will never build a great workforce or a great organization.

Enough is really about discovering what is really important in our lives. While Bogel is optimistic, he says that he has “developed a profound concern that our society is moving in the wrong direction.” The only way to work our way through today's deep-seated problems is to return to values that “stem from principle, virtue and character.” It’s a call to redefine success in our own lives.

We have more than enough of the fool’s gold of marketing and salesmanship and not enough of the real gold of trusteeship and stewardship….We focus too much on things and not enough on the intangibles that make things worthwhile; too much on success (a word I’ve never liked) and not enough on character, without which success is meaningless….Our society cannot and should not tolerate the substitution of moral relativism for a certain form of moral absolutism, and its debasement in the ethical standards of commerce.

Related Interest:
  Fixing the Financial Crisis Once and For All

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:57 PM
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What is the Secret of Great Performers?

Malcolm Gladwell tells us in Outliers that when it comes to success, context is everything. Only by asking where a person comes from can we understand who succeeds and who doesn’t. Geoff Colvin would agree but there’s more. In Talent is Overrated, Colvin rightly asserts that “great performance is in our hands far more than most of us ever suspected.”

When many people never become outstandingly good at what they do, no matter how many years they spend doing it, why do some people become excellent at what they do? Colvin convincingly argues that in general, it’s not innate gifts or intelligence, but what researchers call deliberate practice that creates world-class performers. A study by Anders Ericsson and his associates concluded that “the differences between expert performers and normal adults reflect a life-long period of deliberate effort to improve performance in a specific domain.”

Deliberate practice is not your normal practice. It contains several important elements: it’s designed specifically to improve performance (usually with a teacher or coach), it can be repeated ad nauseam, feedback on results are continuously available, it’s highly demanding mentally (focus and concentration), and it isn’t much fun. Add passion and the good news is that great performance is not reserved for a preordained few. It is available to everyone.

Colvin’s homework makes a great case for the idea that leaders are developed. What is alarming is Colvin observation that “At most companies—as well as most educational institutions and many nonprofit organizations—the fundamentals of great performance are mainly unrecognized or ignored.” He writes that organizations that apply the principles of great performance follow several major rules:

1. Understand that each person in the organization is not just doing a job, but is also being stretched and grown. The best organizations assign people to jobs to push them just beyond their current capabilities and build the skills that are most important. Organizations tend to assign people based on what they’re already good at, not what they need to work on.
2. Find ways to develop leaders within their jobs. One technique: short-term work assignments. Managers don’t leave their jobs, but they take on an additional assignment outside their field of expertise.
3. Encourage their leaders to be active in their communities. Community leadership roles are opportunities for employees to practice skills that will be valuable at work.
4. Understand the critical roles of teachers and of feedback. At most organizations, nobody is in the role of teacher or coach. Employees aren’t told which skills will be most helpful to them and certainly aren’t told how to best develop them.
5. Identify promising performers early. A telling indicator is how interns get others to work with them when they have absolutely no authority.
6. Understand that people development works best through inspiration not authority.
7. Invest significant time, money, and energy in developing people. You don’t develop people on the cheap, and you don’t just bolt a development program onto existing HR procedures.
8. Make leadership development part of the culture. Developing leaders isn’t a program, it’s a way of living.

Talent is Overrated is the most readable and pragmatic book on the topic. The examples and relevant research cited are compelling and his application of great performance principles to self-development, business development and innovation are thought provoking.

Related Interest:
  Outliers: Understanding the Context of Success

Posted by Michael McKinney at 02:29 AM
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Outliers: Understanding the Context of Success

A lot has been written of late about superior performance that often sets conventional thinking on its head. We often assume genius and success is the result of natural gifts and if you don’t have it, then you don’t have it. But research is demonstrating that great performance is more about what we do after we are born than we ever thought. People don’t rise from nothing.

In his new book Outliers (men and women who do things out of the ordinary), Malcolm Gladwell writes:

We pretend that success is exclusively a matter of individual merit. But there’s nothing in any of the histories we’ve looked at so far to suggest things are that simple. These are stories, instead, about people who were given a special opportunity to work really hard and seized it, and who happened to come of age at a time when that extraordinary effort was rewarded by the rest of society. Their success was not just of their own making. It was a product of the world in which they grew up.

Gladwell provides countless stories and examples of successful people—Bill Joy, Bill Gates, the Beatles, Chris Langan and others—and draws interesting connections about their success. Successful people must be considered within the context of their culture and the people that surrounded them. “The values of the world we inhabit and the people we surround ourselves with have a profound effect on who we are.”

The people who stand before kings may look like they did it all by themselves. But in fact they are invariably the beneficiaries of hidden advantages and extraordinary opportunities and cultural legacies that allow them to learn and work hard and make sense of the world in ways others cannot.

If you look hard enough, there is a pattern of achievement. It’s a fascinating read.

You can see a video of Gladwell’s presentation at the 2007 New Yorker Conference 2012: Stories from the Near Future.

Related Interest:
  What is the Secret of Great Performers?

Posted by Michael McKinney at 06:14 PM
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Lead By Example

Leading by example is one of those things we know and remember to do on our way to do something else. The problem is that it requires a lot more inner work than we are willing to put in, but it leverages our leadership more than any other thing we can do.

Unfortunately, it is the norm that leaders don’t know themselves well enough to set an example. Tolstoy once remarked, “Everyone dreams of changing humanity but no one dreams of changing himself.” Yet that’s what it takes to lead by example.

John Baldoni has written an excellent and practical book that addresses areas that leaders need to look at in order to be the kind of person that people will want to follow. Lead by Example contains 50 short chapters (See the Table of Contents here.) that pinpoint an area of concern and how to tackle it. It “demonstrates how leaders leverage their best attributes to overcome their shortcomings in order to build trust and drive results.”

Baldoni breaks up the 50 chapters into four sections that he describes this way:

Set the Right Example
Before you can lead others, you must lead yourself. You need to know what you are made of. Character and conviction matter….Your example is your character in action. Ask yourself:

• How often do I take the time to reflect on my own performance and how it affects my team?
• What am I doing to make myself a better leader?

Act the Part
You need to know who you are leading and the culture in which you intend to lead. Most often, there will be no roadmaps, but there will be plenty of roadblocks. It’s the leader’s job to identify them and put the team in place to remove them….[L]eaders need to set direction, but then step back and let people discover for themselves how to get things done. Ask yourself:

• What am I doing to be sure that people understand their mission?
• How well am I winning over the “fence sitters,” those waiting for things to happen?
• How well am I overcoming obstacles that stand in the way?
• What should I be doing to spread the confidence?

Handle the Tough Stuff
Life comes at you in different directions. Sometimes it will come so hard it will knock you down. There is no shame in falling; what matters is getting up to fight again. When your people see you doing that, they will be encouraged to follow your example. Sometimes you have to collaborate with people who have no interest in you or your ideas. You have to learn to lead when you have no authority to do so. You must prove that you know your stuff. You must use your wits and your influence to succeed. By doing so, you create opportunities for people to listen to what you have to say and give yourself a chance to prove your case. Ask yourself:

• How well am I encouraging alternative points of view?
• What do I do when a member of our team suffers a setback?
• How well do I seek solutions rather than seeking to pin blame?

Put the Team First
No leader lives in a vacuum. It is incumbent that you show people what you think of them, honestly and positively. This means you coach your people for success. Ask yourself:

• How well are we dealing with tension in our team? Is it positive or negative?
• What can I do to make certain we have the right people in the right jobs to do the job right?
• What can I do to demonstrate my appreciation for my team?

The way this book is organized makes it a great reference tool that you can refer to when you are faced with leadership—people—issues. It’s also a good book to put in the hands of those who are seeking to lead in your organization. The thinking and behaviors addressed in this book will pay dividends.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:23 AM
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Richard Branson on Success

When we place too high a value on achievement and fulfillment, we often overlook the important parts of life like character, relationships and service. Richard Branson made a profound statement on success in his book, Business Stripped Bare. The last sentence may take a few reads for its implications to soak in.

Successful people aren’t in possession of secrets known only to themselves. Don’t obsess over people who appear to you to be “winners”, but listen instead to the wisdom of people who’ve led enriching lives—people, for instance, who’ve found time for friends and family. Be generous in your interpretation of what success looks like. The best and most meaningful lives don’t always end happily.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 01:11 PM
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Push Yourself Within Your Comfort Zone

Push yourself beyond your comfort zone. This sounds right because, of course, you should keep learning and growing and experimenting through your career. But it’s not true. It leads people such as Michael Jordan to try their hand at professional baseball.

Instead, you should push yourself within your comfort zone.

Your strengths are your comfort zone. Your strengths are not only activities that strengthen you, but they are also activities where you have the greatest capacity to learn and grow. So if you are going to push yourself—and you should—then push yourself to get better and better at expressing your strengths.

Adapted from The Truth About You by Marcus Buckingham

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:04 AM
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Marcus Buckingham and The Truth About You

Marcus Buckingham has done much to advance the understanding of strengths management. He has now turned his attention to crafting a program more specifically oriented to Generation Y, college students and young professionals.

If you ask young people in America ages 18 to 25, which do you think will help you win in life most, they overwhelmingly (70%) respond by saying, “fixing my weaknesses.” There’s a whole generation of kids coming into the workplace who may understand they are distinct and different, but don’t really know how to think about it or make use of that knowledge not only in the workplace, but in life in general.

Buckingham keeps driving the point (and rightly so), that we need to focus on our strengths, not our weaknesses. Build on your strengths and neutralize your weaknesses. In conjunction with his new book, The Truth About You, he has launched a U.S. tour of universities around the nation to talk to young professionals about to embark on their career paths.

The Truth About You focuses on how you set your career up right—how do you start in such a way that you can push the world toward the best of you; learning to express the best of who you are. It incorporates a candid 20-minute enhanced DVD (a reworking of the effective Trombone Player Wanted film); an interactive book, which takes up where the film leaves off; and a reMemo Pad, a way of using the raw material of your week to clearly identify your strengths and weaknesses. The DVD alone is worth the price of the book.

Counter-intuitively, he writes, “Your strengths aren’t what you’re good at and your weaknesses aren’t what you’re bad at.” There are things that you are good at, but they drain you, even bore you. Strengths are not activities you’re necessarily good at, they’re activities that strengthen you. A strength is an activity that before you’re doing it you look forward to doing it; while you’re doing it, time goes by quickly and you can concentrate; after you’ve done it; it feels good to do it. A weakness is an activity that drains you or weakens you, even if you’re good at it.

Buckingham writes that you’ll never find the perfect job. You’ll need to build it—little by little—gradually.

Buckingham’s pragmatic application of these concepts is important. And the earlier in life you understand them and build on them the better. Hopefully Buckingham will now turn his attention to an educational system that overwhelmingly focuses on weaknesses and is not designed to encourage the development of student’s real strengths. All children have amazing talents and we squander them. We need to convert parents and teachers if we are to begin to abandon some of our counterproductive beliefs.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:01 AM
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Fixing the Financial Crisis Once and For All

Hoping to sound like leaders, Washington lawmakers want to get to the bottom of this financial crisis and create regulations to keep it from ever happening again. I don’t think is comes as any surprise to anyone that greed—on the part of both borrowers and lenders—is at the bottom of it. You can’t regulate greed out of existence. Regulation just improves creativity. Greed is regulated by character. Character is built at home, in our schools, in our churches, and yes, in our businesses.

No one likes to talk about character because it isn’t a quick fix, it often goes against our inclinations, it’s not immediately measurable, you can’t take credit for it, and it’s a time consuming, never ending process. George Eliot wrote in Middlemarch: “Character is not cut in marble; it is not something solid and unalterable. It is something living and changing.” It’s built in individuals day by day in little, almost imperceptible ways over the course of a lifetime. The problem is that we have only given a patronizing nod to character and politely moved on with the business at hand. How will I get mine if I don’t play it like everyone else? We learn too late, without character, no one gets anything.

Character needs to be part of the very fiber of the organization. It must be a part of its philosophy and vision. I don’t mean a statement of values we hang on the wall, but a statement of behavior beginning with the CEO on down. Tom Peters wrote in Thriving on Chaos that “effective visions are beacons and controls when all else are up for grabs….To turn the vision into a beacon, leaders at all levels must model behavior consistent with the vision at all times.”

In July, Hugo Dixon opined in the Wall Street Journal, “Greed for higher returns entices investors to take risks; fear causes them to avoid excess. When markets are healthy, the two are finely balanced. Problems emerge when that balance is lost.” You will find character behind this balancing act. Character stabilizes both people and markets. Character is inseparable from the culture in which it is formed.

Nothing will fix the financial crisis once and for all, but character will regulate it. Greed is a human issue and it will always be with us. It will always be something we need to train ourselves, our children, and our employees to regulate from within. The consequences can be devastating.

Apparently, Mr. Gekko, greed is not good. Lou Mannheim was right, “The main thing about money, Bud, is that it makes you do things you don't want to do.” Or shouldn’t do.

Related Interest:
  Ethics: Reinforcing Fixed Points

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:04 AM
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Managing Brand You: It’s No Accident

“Whatever your brand stands for, you have to deliver on the promise,” writes Richard Branson in Business Stripped Bare. “Don’t’ promise what you can’t deliver, and deliver everything you promise. That’s the only way you’ll ever control your brand. And beware: brands always mean something. If you don’t define what the brand means, a competitor will.” It’s no different on a personal level.

We all have the opportunity to determine how others see us. We are in charge of our own brand. The space between how you are viewed by other people and how you want to be viewed by other people is the place where you begin to build your brand. “Brand YOU,” writes Jerry Wilson and Ira Blumenthal in Managing Brand You, “is about making choices regarding how you want to live your life and how to build the positive and favorable impressions you desire with your target audience.”

Begin by asking your closest friends for a candid list of twenty-five words that best describe you and what you represent. Make your own list as well. How does it look? How does it compare to your brand identity? How you want to be perceived? Wilson and Blumenthal ask:

Are you hoping one of your brand promises is reliability? Then why are you always late? Are you working to make sure those around you believe you are a team player? Then why do you never volunteer for a committee or activity? Is you perception of your personal brand that of a person who is logical, thoughtful, and contemplative? Then why do you make seat-of-the-pants, spur-of-the-moment decisions?

Managing Brand You takes you through a valuable seven step process for defining, creating and implementing your personal brand. It is as much about reinvention and integrating your values, principles and beliefs with your actions—you brand essence. It’s about not letting your past control your future. Your brand should be built on your strengths with a grasp of areas where you need to improve in order to support your strengths.

Simply put, to place yourself in the satisfying and successful life that you imagine, you need to find your inner drive and to discover the skills you have that can help you find your best space. Having a brand identity that is right for you is no accident. It begins by looking deep inside yourself to find out what motivates you and to discover the principles that guide your life. And it is equally important to recognize where you do not want to be, as it is to visualize where you want to be.

Emphasis is placed on the importance of a consistent message over the long haul. They liken it to running a marathon race. It’s easy to get distracted from your goals by the inertia and pressures of your current brand. A brand is not a quickie makeover, but a long-term commitment to personal improvement.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:14 AM
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Do You Suffer From Any of These Energy Drains?

In our fast-paced, twenty-four hour society we are constantly distracted and diverted from working on what we should be working on. It creates lives of almost habitual scatteredness. Focus is the sine qua non of reaching our potential. This scatteredness is largely responsible for draining us of the energy we need to accomplish our goals. Additionally, in Success 101, John Maxwell outlines three difficult situations that we need to be aware of and learn to manage around:

Activity Without Direction – doing things that don’t seem to matter
Burden Without Action – not being able to do things that really matter
Conflict Without Resolution – not being able to deal with what’s the matter

These sap our energy because they chip away at our dignity and needlessly undermine our ability to focus. If we find ourselves faced with any of these difficult circumstances, we need to work extra hard to manage around them. The first step to accomplishing this is seeing the big picture and knowing our part in it. Knowing our purpose can insulate us from many of the external distractions we face on a daily basis.

Maxwell writes, “The better you are at making sure you’re doing what you should be doing, the better chance you have for making an impact on others and being successful.” At the same time, not all stress is bad. We need to look for opportunities within our circumstances to expand our capacity. Loehr and Schwartz write in The Power of Full Engagement, that "Any form of stress that prompts discomfort has the potential to expand our capacity—physically, mentally, emotionally or spiritually—so long as it is followed by adequate recovery." It’s part of learning to manage yourself exceptionally well.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:46 AM
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Nice Guys Can Get the Corner Office

Apparently, Nice Guys Can Get the Corner Office. The problem isn’t being a nice guy (or gal), the problem is in finding the right balance. It’s having the emotional intelligence to know how to interact with others without “giving away the store.” This book is about finding that balance.

According to the authors – Russ Edeloman, Timothy Hiltabiddle and Charles Manz - Nice Guy Syndrome is a big problem in today's workplace. 61% of people they surveyed said that they struggle with being too nice at work, and that they feel it has a negative impact on their success.

Most of us like to be considered “nice.” We want to be liked. We equate it with traits like cooperativeness and agreeableness, but it often ends up being manifested in unproductive behaviors that come across as weak, passive and docile. This can create a whole new set of (passive-aggressive) issues as we try to cope with being marginalized. What is “niceness?” How should it look? The authors define it as:

• Attempting to optimize outcomes for both others and ourselves
• Striving to balance assertiveness with cooperation to achieve a spirit of collaboration
• Honoring the value and strength pf others and ourselves
• Seeking optimal outcomes for everyone involved by emphasizing truthfulness and authenticity
• Openly confronting challenges and disagreements and embracing the innovation-promoting benefits of constructive idea conflict.

They offer a Nice Guys Bill of Rights and their corresponding strategies to help you find the balance between being a pushover and being a jerk. If you are overly nice, understanding and recognizing these rights will help you to change your behaviors and how you are perceived. In the book they present strategies for practicing these rights in you life without jumping into the other ditch by overcompensating. If you happen to find yourself already in the other ditch, these strategies will help you to rein yourself in before you’re forced to.

1. You have the right to SELF-AWARENESS – Know your strengths & weaknesses. Before you can set a course for where you want to go, first you must be completely honest about where you are. A thorough knowledge of your strengths and weaknesses is extremely valuable.
2. You have the right to SPEAK UP – Let your opinions be heard. The ability and willingness to speak up is essential if you want your ideas to be heard. Learn to have an opinion, but understand that you don’t always need to express it.
3. You have the right to SET BOUNDARIES – Set and respect them. "No" seems to be the hardest word for nice guys. Nice guys must set good boundaries and consistently reinforce them as needed.
4. You have the right to CONFRONT – Address issues directly and without fear. Since nice guys instinctively want to get along with everyone , conflict is especially difficult to face. It is very important to learn to address issues directly and overcome the fear associated with confrontation.
5. You have the right to CHOICE – Make choices without guilt. Nice guys often feel powerless, as if they have no choice in a given situation. The truth is that they frequently give away their power to choose. The key? To own your choices and, without guilt, to make the right decision for you and your organization - even if it means people will be angry or disappointed with you.
6. You have the right to EXPECT RESULTS – Be accountable to others and yourself. Maintaining accountability sometimes makes you unpopular. Regardless, to be effective nice guys must be willing to hold others (and themselves) accountable for results and to follow through on their commitments.
7. You have the right to BE BOLD – Push the envelope. Taking risks is extremely challenging for nice guys. If they want to succeed at a high level, however, they must be willing to go beyond their comfort zone and place a high value their goals and priorities.
8. You have the right to WIN – Finish first. The business world is highly competitive. Nice guys, however, sometimes shy away from competition because they aren't comfortable with "winning" (and other people "losing".) While a win/win scenario is ideal, it is not always possible. Everyone is ultimately best served when the best ideas and solutions win, not when nice guys "play small." Nice guys owe it to themselves and their organizations to do their absolute best at all times and embrace winning.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:59 AM
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Our Performances Matter: The Encore Effect

What is the encore effect? It is delivering what you do so well that you are asked to do it again and again. It’s people wanting more of what you do best. No matter what we do, we are showcasing who we are and what we care about. As we go through our day we can either deliver an average performance or a remarkable one. A remarkable performance keeps them coming back for more.

Mark Sanborn, author of The Encore Effect, believes “Our performances matter. They can have a powerful impact on those around us. As parents, our performance shapes and influences our children. As employees and managers, our performance can make our company better, move a project forward, spark ideas among colleagues, and influence customers.”

Of course, a remarkable performance can only come from someone who knows what they do best, and is passionate enough about it to have invested the time to develop expertise in it and to live it authentically. It’s who they are and it’s infectious.

How can each of us make our own performance bigger, better, and bolder? How can we make what we do consistently remarkable and thereby make a difference in our sphere of influence?

Mark Sanborn offers five steps for making your performance remarkable; for bring your best self to whatever you are doing:

Passion: Passion is the fuel that drives our life’s purpose. Our passion for what we do pulls others along. “Nobody likes to be driven by someone else; it feels like being pushed. But when someone can show us how to be bigger on the inside—in our attitude and mind-set—that can help attract or pull us toward what we can become.

Prepare: How remarkable performance begins. “Each of us is creating our future right now. Whether the future is five minutes from now or five years, it is determined by our preparation—or lack of it.” Be a remarkable performance waiting to happen.

Practice: “There are no perfect violinists—or salespeople, executives, teachers, or parents for that matter. But deliberate practice is what distinguishes those who excel from those who get by.”

Perform: Be the performance. “One hallmark of a remarkable performance is authenticity.” Be yourself. Engage your audience by giving them your attention. “To create the Encore Effect, you shouldn’t be focused on your own happiness or success, but on the happiness and success of others.”

Polish: The difference is in the details. “There are lots of details that matter when it comes to creating a remarkable performance.” Keep polishing what you do.

Sanborn is no stranger to remarkable performances and he continues to polish his life’s work. He also highlights some pitfalls that we need to avoid along the way like arrogance, fear and impatience.

Most importantly, Sanborn points to the real goal of remarkable performances—helping others to achieve their own remarkable performances. “Remarkable performers see in others what they have discovered in themselves—the ability to reach unexplored and unanticipated levels of performance. They inspire others through their own performances, instruct others through their teaching, and help others improve through their encouragement."

Pass this title along to others—young and old. It contains a simple idea that taken to heart, can make a big difference.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 02:33 PM
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Are You Having a No-Good, Very-Bad Day?

If you are like most of us, anything going on but what you want, warrants a complaint. Not an action-oriented, let’s get this solved kind of complaint, but your everyday run-of-the-mill mindless kind of complaining that leads nowhere (except to more negative thinking).

Jon Gordon, author of The No Complaining Rule, says there are two main reasons why we complain: (1) because we are fearful and feel helpless and two, because it has become a habit. He urges us to outgrow the complaining habit. He cites a Gallup poll that finds that negativity costs companies nearly $300 billion each year.

“In life,” Gordon writes, “you have a choice between two roads. The positive road and the negative road. The positive road will lead to enhanced health, happiness, and success and the negative road will lead to misery, anger, and failure. Since your bus can’t be on two roads at the same time, you must decide which road you want to be on. And wen you complain you travel down the negative road.”

“In life,” Gordon writes, “you have a choice between two roads. The positive road and the negative road. The positive road will lead to enhanced health, happiness, and success and the negative road will lead to misery, anger, and failure. Since your bus can’t be on two roads at the same time, you must decide which road you want to be on. And when you complain you travel down the negative road.”

As former chronic complainer, Gordon effectively delivers his message through a story. The No Complaining Rule doesn’t rule out complaining – it requires that it be constructive.

Employees are not allowed to mindlessly complain to their coworkers. If they have a problem or complaint about their job, their company, their customer, or anything else, they are encouraged to bring the issue to their manager or someone who is in a position to address the complaint. However, the employees must share one or two possible solutions to their complaint as well.

Gordon explains how do develop a positive culture by creating a culture where negativity can’t breed, grow, and survive. A crucial key is to all this is to focus on gratitude. “Research shows that when we count three blessings a day, we get a measurable boost in happiness that uplifts and energizes us. It’s also physiologically impossible to be stressed and thankful at the same time. Two thoughts cannot occupy our mind at the same time. If you are focusing on gratitude, you can’t be negative. You can also energize and engage your coworkers by letting them know you are grateful for them and their work.”

Start a revolution in your own life, at work and at home. Download free No Complaining Rule posters and other tools from Jon Gordon’s web site. Have no complaining day!

Related Interest:
  10 Rules to Fuel Your Life, Work, and Team with Positive Energy

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:22 PM
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Are You a PITA?

I first heard the term PITA (Pain In The Ass) when referring to clients or coworkers from friend and international consultant to accountancy firms, Chris Frederiksen (The 2020 Group), in his seminar, How To Build A Million Dollar Practice in the early 80s. It resonated with everyone there as Robert Orndorff’s and Dulin Clark’s new book, The PITA Principle: How to Work With (and Avoid Becoming) a Pain in the Ass, will resonate today with anyone that has had experience working with groups of people anywhere. Mention PITA and no doubt someone’s name or face will pop into your head.

They define PITAs as those “folks who arouse our emotions, challenge our patience, and make us labor for our money on a daily basis.” Their goal in mentioning this is two-fold. First they want to give you some coping strategies to help you deal more effectively with those people. Secondly, they want you to avoid being on someone else’s PITA list. We can all be PITAs from time to time, but by promoting a little self-awareness they hope to help you to either avoid or emerge from being a PITA. This second goal is not an easy task.

Heightened self-awareness, or lack of, appears to mystify some of society’s most prominent figures, from the corporate executive who unknowingly yet chronically berates his employees through abuses of power, to the physician who patronizes her patients thought her intellectual arrogance, to the politician who cannot and will not admit mistakes in judgment out of ego-preserving stubbornness.

The authors note that those people who refuse to take the time to gain a little self-awareness and learn to soften or manage their PITA tendencies, “don’t get the importance of developing the other side of themselves because they are either too self-absorbed, too unaware, or too defensive to let other information enter into their consciousness.” This is a prescription for self-destruction.

They describe eight types of PITAs in detail and offer some coping strategies for each and advice to help you get some perspective on their behavior. You’ll also find a selection of ten more PITA types that get honorable mention.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 07:58 AM
Permalink | Comments (2) | TrackBacks (0) | Personal Development

What Are Your PITA Tendencies?

To get you started in your own PITA self-discovery we offer this assesment from Robert Orndorff's and Dulin Clark's book The PITA Principle They write, "Just as some PITA types are tougher to work with than others, you'll have greater potential or tendencies to behave like certain PITA types more so than others.

To take this quiz you will need to print this page from this post's permalink page or simply write your answers on a separate piece of paper. Use the following scale to enter the number that most closely reflects your feelings. After answering all of the questions, score the total sum for each PITA type according to the instructions given below.

1 Strongly Disagree

2 Disagree

3 Slightly Agree

4 Agree

5 Strongly Agree

Quiz Questions

1.	_____	Being organized is not one of my greatest strengths.
2.	_____	I primarily respect people of power and status.
3.	_____	I like to plan everything out in advance and I’m frustrated by changes to the plans.
4.	_____	People would describe me more as a cynic than a Pollyanna.
5.	_____	I expect to get what I want when I go after it.
6.	_____	I’d rather work with people who are accommodating and friendly versus tough and competitive.
7.	_____	I get defensive when a co-worker disagrees with me.
8.	_____	It’s important to me that my co-workers acknowledge my accomplishments.
9.	_____	I tend to see the glass as half empty.
10.	_____	It’s a challenge for me to be on time.
11.	_____	I believe that the needs of the worker are as important as the needs of the company.
12.	_____	It’s difficult to work on a committee and try to accommodate everybody’s ideas.
13.	_____	It’s important for me to have a boss who compliments me when I’m doing my job well.
14.	_____	I have difficulty owning up to my mistakes.
15.	_____	I have difficulty saying what I mean in a concise manner.
16.	_____	I enjoy being the talker rather than the listener.
17.	_____	I don’t like to tap-dance around people’s feelings; I tell it like it is.
18.	_____	I believe in the saying, “If you want it done right, do it yourself.”
19.	_____	I prefer to put myself first.
20.	_____	I am very guarded against negative feedback.
21.	_____	I am most comfortable working in a supportive and nurturing environment.
22.	_____	I get annoyed when other people achieve more than me or acquire more than me.
23.	_____	I have to force myself to attend to details.
24.	_____	I get annoyed with co-workers who can’t see my point of view.
25.	_____	I am impatient when it comes to my career; I want more challenges, creativity, and responsibility.
26.	_____	I believe that social gatherings and “feel-good” activities are a waste of time.
27.	_____	I have trouble identifying my weaknesses when completing performance evaluations.
28.	_____	It’s important for me to get regular feedback from my co-workers.
29.	_____	I prefer projects in which I get to make the final decision.
30.	_____	I deserve a job that is challenging, but also allows me plenty of personal time.
31.	_____	I prefer a highly flexible work environment over a highly structured one.
32.	_____	I believe that I have more skills and abilities than the great majority of my co-workers.
33.	_____	It’s much more important to be respected than liked.
34.	_____	I have a tendency to take minor criticisms and blow them out of proportion.
35.	_____	I value co-workers who address issues and concernts with me in a sensitive and caring way.

PITA Quiz Score Sheet

Scoring Your Responses

For each PITA type below, add the scores from the survey for the question numbers listed next to each PITA type. Place the total on the line in front of each type. High scores indicate that you might have potential for behaving like that type of PITA in various work situations.

Total Your Scores	Learn More About Your PITA Type
Add #'s 7, 14, 20, 27, and 34 ____ TOTAL The Sealed PITA	A Sealed PITA is someone who is closed off and defensive about receiving feedback. He or she is generally on guard when it comes to receiving constructive criticism.
Add #'s 4, 9, 17, 26, aand 33 ____ TOTAL The Crusty PITA	A Crusty PITA is someone who is negative, cynical mean-spirited, grouchy, and pessimistic. These types of people see the glass as half-empty.
Add #'s 2, 8, 16, 22, and 32 ____TOTAL The Overstuffed PITA	An Overstuffed PITA is someone who is self-absorbed, attention hungry, and aggressively self-promoting.
Add #'s 6, 13, 21, 28, and 35 ____TOTAL The Soggy PITA	A Soggy PITA is someone who tends to be whiny, high-maintenance, needy, and afraid of addressing issues head on.
Add #'s 1, 10, 15, 23, and 31 ____TOTAL The Sloppy PITA	A Sloppy PITA is someone who tends to be disorganized, inattentive to detail, imprecise in tasks, and generally "all over the place."
Add #'s 3, 12, 18, 24, and 29 ____TOTAL The Rigid PITA	A Rigid PITA is someone who tends to be picky, particular, stubborn, inflexible, and incompromising.
Add #'s 5, 11, 19, 25, and 30 ____TOTAL The Royal PITA	A Royal PITA is someone who tends to be self-centered and spoiled and who has a sense of entitlement, expecting to get everything that he or she wants and being somewhat oblivious to how others receive him or her.

After determining your PITA tendencies, you will want to refer to the corresponding chapter in the book that describes your PITA type in more detail. The authors maintain a PITA blog.

Categories: Leadership Development

What Is Your Plan For Personal Growth?

You won’t grow to your potential without a plan. You’ll get older, but not better. Experience guarantees nothing. Growth is intentional. If you are not growing you’re just putting in time. Waiting.

Crucibles of Leadership by Robert Thomas, is an important book that asks, “What is your personal learning strategy?” A PLS is “a highly individual plan for leveraging hard-won insights about learning from adversity and using practice to improve performance.”

We all have crucibles, but it’s what we do with them that is important. Thomas writes that crucibles “are like trials or tests that corner individuals and force them to answer questions about who they are and what is really important to them.” Crucibles become valuable when we intentionally mine them for lessons that make us more effective, aware and integrated. Warren Bennis points out in the foreword that the self-awareness we should gain is “the kind of deeper understanding of self that then turns outward rather than inward and results in better understanding of others and the organizations that matter to us.”

Thomas says that we have to change our approach to learning. We shouldn’t wait for just the right moment to arrive, but learn in the moment—in real time—to, as he writes, “learn while doing.”

Preparation is essential to learning. In order to take advantage of our crucibles, we must develop a Personal Learning Strategy (PLS). Thomas introduces a framework for crafting a PLS complete with exercises to help you properly move through each step. It begins with a little introspection—understanding why you want to lead, what motivates you to do so and understanding how you learn. Then you need to access your capability in three core areas: adaptive capacity, engaging others through shared meaning, and integrity. From here you can see areas where you need to improve and strengthen in order to reach your leadership goals. Now you can assign behaviors to each of these areas that you can consciously practice at work and at home. He suggests that you “scan your landscape at work and at home, and identify those instances and roles out of your comfort zone that will allow you to stretch into new behaviors, perspectives, and leadership capabilities.”

Organizations too, can tap into the power of a PLS by adopting an experience-based approach to their leadership development program. Organizations need to recognize the importance of crucible experiences and provide the resources people need to extract insight from them in addition to the regular technical and skills training people should be receiving. Most often those resources involve creating a process that links the two learning opportunities together.

One important note on a trap that people and organizations sometimes fall into in their zeal to develop character and leadership, Thomas writes, “We create enough pressures to perform that we don’t need to invent new ones just so that we can accelerate leader development. The trick is to harness the crucibles that life sets in motion so the opportunity for learning is not squandered.” Life gives us enough opportunities to learn, but often, we just need help getting the lesson we should be getting from it.

Accomplished leaders say that experience is their best teacher. They learned their most meaningful and important leadership lessons—lessons that they’ve integrated into their own leadership style—through crucibles. These were critical events and experiences, times of testing and trial, failure more often than grand success, that grabbed them by the lapels and demanded to know “What do you stand for?” and “What are you going to do?” A situation arose that did not respect age, gender, generation, nationality, talent, or charisma; all it asked was that the person step up and be someone or do something they’d never been or done before.

Having a Personal Learning Strategy is a way of thinking about and looking at life that allows you to proactively grow from what life throws at you, rather than being knocked out by it. You need a Personal Learning Strategy.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 02:06 PM
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Focus Like a Laser Beam

We all know that when we focus on something we leverage our efforts. Success Magazine founder Orison Swett Marden, wrote, “Every great man has become great, every successful man has succeeded, in proportion as he has confined his powers to one particular channel.” But focusing, determining exactly what to focus on, and focusing on our strengths to make a tangible contribution, isn’t as easy as it sounds. Simplifying your life by eliminating as many of those things that take an inordinate amount of time and don’t contribute substantially to your goals is sometimes a very difficult thing to do. Yet it is important to keep in mind that habits drive most of what we do, the ways we react and respond and so we need to constantly review what we are spending our time doing.

In her very practical book, Focus Like a Laser Beam, Lisa Haneberg writes, “Leaders need to know what laser focus looks and feels like. The first and most obvious sign of focus is that everyone knows what’s important.” To do this, people need to know what’s relevant. “When you define success, you define relevance.” She offers four questions to apply when trying to define relevance:

1. Relative to all the things I could be doing, is this something that will have the greatest impact on the most important goals?
2. Will this task improve results or effectiveness beyond what we are doing today?
3. Will anyone notice if this doesn’t get done?
4. If I ran into a contingency today and could only do two other tasks, what would I do? Would this task still be important?

Too often we “agree to do too much and then we are unable to execute well. To improve focus, leaders must change how they define what’s relevant and say no much more often….It’s better to do a few things well than many things poorly.” She encourages us to complete one great thing each day. “Great things facilitate and enable forward progress.”

Lisa maintains a blog about the craft of management and leadership called Management Craft.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:32 AM
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Bringing Your Emotions Under Control

Our emotions can derail us. Keeping them under control is a huge part of our success as a leader. Of course, self-awareness is the key to making this happen.

Before your emotions are get the best of you, Dondi Scumaci, author of Designed For Success, recommends that we learn to ask a new set of questions:

How am I feeling?
Why am I feeling that way?
What do I need?
What am I afraid will happen?
How do I want this to turn out?
What can I do to achieve the result I need?

She writes, “The moment you begin this self-inquiry, a switch flips in your brain. You are moving from a purely emotional response to an objective-based response.”

Update:
Stephen Baum, author of What Made jack welch JACK WELCH, has a good post on his blog about “grabs.” These are instinctive responses to events by which we are emotionally hijacked by deep-seated fears embedded in us years ago. Check it out.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 07:14 AM
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5 Leadership Lessons: How the Best Get Better and Stay That Way

Sports psychologist and executive coach Graham Jones believes that the real key to excellence in both sports and business is mental toughness. In the current Harvard Business Review he writes that the most successful people do five things to get better and stay that way.

  Learn to Love the Pressure. To do that you must dedicate yourself to constant self-improvement. That is made a lot easier if you learn to compete with yourself and block out the drama of those around you. It’s a choice. “Greg Searle, who won an Olympic gold medal in rowing, is often asked whether success was worth the price. He always gives the same reply: ‘I never made any sacrifices; I made choices.’”

  Fixate on the Long Term. Map out short-term goals in every area that affects your performance to make sure you meet your long-term goal. Long term success is paved with small achievements.

  Iron Sharpens Iron. “Train” with the people who will push you the hardest. “Smart companies consciously create situations in which their elite performers push one another to levels they would never reach if they were working with less-accomplished colleagues.”

  Reinvent Yourself. Once you become the benchmark, you need to keep reinventing yourself. To do this you need to develop an insatiable appetite for feedback; you need to be “hungry for advice on how to develop and progress. One word of caution, however: While it’s good to feel challenged, you need to make sure that any feedback you get is constructive. If criticism doesn’t seem helpful at first, probe to see if you can get useful insights about what’s behind the negative feedback. Get more specifics. You should be able to see concrete improvements in your performance after getting detailed coaching advice.”

  Celebrate the Victories. Think of it as constructive celebration. Otherwise it can lead to complacency. “Celebration is more than an emotional release. Done effectively, it involves a deep level of analysis and enhanced awareness. The very best performers do not move on before they have scrutinized and understood thoroughly the factors underpinning their success.”

In the end, the keyword is resilience. Jones concludes, “Most of those participating in the Olympics this summer will walk away from the games without grabbing a single medal. Those with real mettle will get back into training again. That’s what truly separates elite performers from ordinary high achievers. It takes supreme, almost unimaginable grit and courage to get back into the ring and fight to the bitter end. That’s what the Olympic athlete does. If you want to be an elite performer in business, that’s what you need to do, too.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:11 AM
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Change the Way You See Yourself

The authors that brought you Change the Way You See Everything have taken the principles of asset-based thinking and applied them more specifically to you – the individual – in Change the Way You See Yourself. Like its predecessor, this book too is a feast for the eyes. I enjoy the graphics, but the message they convey is vital to your personal development.

Asset-based thinking is a way of looking at yourself that emphasizes what is working in your life and the strengths you possess. It is a way of freeing yourself from negative and unproductive thinking. It allows you to focus on what you can do and not what you can’t do (as often seems to be our default mode of thinking). They write that with asset-based thinking, “you use surprise, serendipity, and even setbacks to make the journey more interesting and more worthwhile. You are more confident in who you are, where you are going, and how to get there.”

In the section on power they invite us to look at it in a new way. Authors Kathryn Cramer and Hank Wasiak write:

When it comes to power, most people think of accumulating material wealth, status, authority, knowledge, and expertise. These are potent external sources of power. AS such, they provide you with control over a vast array of resources – from money, to land, to market share, to intellectual property. While building large reservoirs of external power may be useful, it is not enough for getting results. There is another source of power equally important and often more vital to your leadership and success.

Instead of relying primarily on external power sources to fuel your progress, look deeply inside for what can move you forward. You have a huge reservoir of internally generated power just waiting to be tapped. Internal sources of power derive from who you are – not what you have. Your internal power is defined by your Signature Presence – your unique combination of passions, capabilities, qualities, values, and beliefs. Signature Presence power gives you what it takes to get results when externally derived power is not enough.

Leadership sage Warren Bennis once said, “A point of view is worth 50 IQ points.” He knew That when you live by the power of your convictions you stand taller, sit straighter, and speak more confidently. You raise the level of your game. Others know you as a “force of nature” – someone who will not be deterred and who doesn’t give up.

People crave clarity … your voice rings clear when you stand for something.
People want wisdom … your mind creates meaning when you stand for something.
People gravitate toward hope … your ideas and promises hold sway when you stand for something.

Related Reading:
  Asset-Based Thinking

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:40 AM
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A Navigation System for Women in the Workplace

Dondi Scumaci has written a book – Designed For Success – to help women navigate their careers. She says, “I am passionate about helping people release their potential so they can have real impact, leverage their God-given talents and maximize opportunities in life and in business.”

Many of the principles presented here, of course, apply to both men and women. But she has tailored it to address the unique obstacles women face in the workplace including how to overcome the natural aversion to negotiation, how to send the right message with your wardrobe, overcoming female stereotypes and the importance of fostering a network of mentorship relationships with other female professionals.

Women bring a unique set of traits to the workplace that are not as valued as they should be. Their strength lies in developing and applying them to whatever they are involved in and not trying to emulate male traits. In the book she offers Ten Commandments for Women in the Workplace. Here are some takeaways on developing your leadership capabilities:

  You have to be something before you can get something. Maybe we don’t actually say it, but there are times when we hold back the best of who we are because “that’s not our job”? Admit it. Haven’t you ever thought, “That’s not my problem,” or “I don’t get paid enough to put up with this!”? OK, I’ll go first. I have. When it comes to personal leadership, we can’t wait for the position to demonstrate it. We can’t wait for the promotion to make the difference, because the difference is what makes the promotion.

  Knowing how you fit – how your work fits – into the bigger picture, is really important. When you understand the flow of work and the broader objectives of the organization, you work in context.

  Check for alignment between what you are doing and what matters most to your organization. The more aligned you are with the goals and priorities of the organization, the more valuable and relevant you become.

  Instead of trying to increase compliance with your processes, view them from your customer’s perspective and find ways to make them more user friendly. You become more valuable to the organization when you search for and deliver solutions. At this level you are not waiting for an assignment. You are actively engaged in the process of continuous improvement.

  The most valuable, vital employees are rivers, not reservoirs of information. They do not collect and store knowledge. They allow knowledge to flow through them by coaching and mentoring others, They give information away.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 01:05 PM
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Is Your Problem Self-Correcting?

From the Pick Your Battles Department comes some well-phrased, good advice from Bryan Hurlbut from his book Making It Count. I’ve adapted a few excerpts to give you the main idea:

With so many battles raging around us, it’s important to realize our limitations. We deal with other’s emotions and our emotions; we deal with coworkers’ inadequacies and our own inadequacies; we deal with abused authority and our own frustrations with abused authority. There are so many opportunities to become frustrated, disheartened, exasperated, angry and dejected that we really don’t need to go looking for things to add to our emotional and professional plates.

Because these stressors are so prevalent, we can’t carry all of them or we’ll break. So, how do you keep the stressors down to a minimum, increase your productivity and keep yourself out of trouble with your boss all at the same time? Evaluate the situation and ask yourself this question, “Is this self-correcting?” If the answer is “yes,” ten you have discovered one more key to unlocking yourself from a heavy burden.

How many times have you run across experiences that were so extremely frustrating that you wanted to retaliate but felt the prison term wasn’t worth the effort? You can see the problem, you can see the proposed solution won’t work, and yet, no one will listen to you. Then, to add insult to injury, the problem that will arise by following this so-called solution directly affects your area of concern. That means you will be the one having to clean up the mess in the end. As frustrating as this my be, you must realize that no matter how hard you try to fight the process, you are destined to lose because the political waters you are skiing in are shark-infested, and the only people who have the shark repellant are too busy steering the boat into the most beautiful sunset they have ever imagined. So now you are faced with a dilemma. You ask yourself, “Do I continue to fight and possibly sacrifice my position and future with my employer? Or, do I calmly vocalize my concerns, go along for the ride (knowing that it’s going to be inconvenient) and just do as I’m told, hoping that sooner or later management will se that this solution is as futile as I had suggested?” To answer this question, first ask yourself, “Is this self-correcting?” It is it self-correcting, you’re done. Consider it job security.

Keep in mind too, that from time to time you will be the one with the “brilliant” solution that proves to be defective or your assessment of someone else’s solution is wrong and it may just be the thing that works. So don’t sabotage the situation. He cautions, “Don’t walk through the situation constantly trying to prove that you are right and others are wrong. When the decision is made, try with all your might to make it work, and if it fails, you will have no regrets. Equally as important, you have proven yourself to be a team player who is not a spoiled child and who can continue to bring great value to an organization even when you don’t get your way.” Well put.

Most problems do correct themselves. If the damaged caused by the solution isn’t irreparable, give it time and move on.

He has written up a lot of good advice in this little book that will help you leave a situation better than you found it and here is one more to keep in mind: You are not responsible for what you say; you’re responsible for what people hear. Good material.

Related Posts:
  Focus on the War, Not the Battle
  A Pyrrhic Victory

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:52 AM
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Fortune: The Best Advice I Ever Got

Fortune magazine asked 19 people for the best advice that most influenced their lives. Here are several excepts from that feature:

General David Petraeus: Commanding general, multinational force – Iraq
The bottom line is that seriously bright folks thought very differently about important issues, and the debates on various topics were wonderful. All in all, in fact, the experience was invaluable. It may sound trite, but experiencing that not everyone saw the world at all remotely the same was good preparation for many of the experiences I've had since then.

Indra Nooyi: Chairman and CEO, Pepsico
Whatever anybody says or does, assume positive intent. You will be amazed at how your whole approach to a person or problem becomes very different. When you assume negative intent, you're angry. If you take away that anger and assume positive intent, you will be amazed. Your emotional quotient goes up because you are no longer almost random in your response. You don't get defensive. You don't scream. You are trying to understand and listen because at your basic core you are saying, "Maybe they are saying something to me that I'm not hearing." So "assume positive intent" has been a huge piece of advice for me.

Sam Palmisano: Chairman and CEO, IBM
I've noticed that some of the most effective leaders don't make themselves the center of attention. They are respectful. They listen. This is an appealing personal quality, but it's also an effective leadership attribute. Their selflessness makes the people around them comfortable. People open up, speak up, contribute. They give those leaders their very best.

Tony Robbins: Performance coach
Jim Rohn, a personal-development speaker, said, 'Tony, think about it this way. If your worst enemy drops sugar in your coffee, what's going to happen to you? Nothing. But what if your best friend drops strychnine in your coffee? You're dead. You have to stand guard at the door of your mind."

What’s the best advice you ever got?

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:23 AM
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How To Have Just Enough Anxiety

Robert Rosen has written an excellent book on an issue we all deal with—anxiety. It’s not a bad thing, but “if you let it overwhelm you, it will turn to panic. If you deny or run from it, you will become complacent.” Rosen believes that our problem in dealing with anxiety stems from faulty thinking. In Just Enough Anxiety, he writes, “It goes something like this: Change and uncertainty make me anxious. Anxiety is bad, a sign of weakness. Therefore, I have to avoid change and uncertainty. I have to do whatever I can to avoid anxiety.”

Balance comes from a right attitude and a proper perspective. Dealing with anxiety is no different.

The success of great leaders is all about creating the right level of anxiety for growth and performance. It is their uncommon ability to create just enough tension—within themselves and their organizations—that unleashes the human energy that drives powerful leadership, accelerated growth, and winning companies.

What’s wrong with having too much or too little anxiety?

RR: Too much anxiety comes from negative thinking. When we feel too much anxiety, we attack change. We become combative or controlling as we try to ease the pain we feel. Too little anxiety is grounded in contentment. When we feel too little anxiety, we avoid change. We value the status quo and believe everything will be okay as long as everything stays the same. If your company is going through tough times like a bad economy or a merger, you definitely don’t want too little anxiety.

What exactly is “just enough anxiety”?

RR: The right level of anxiety gives individuals and organizations an emotional charge that helps us thrive in an uncertain world. As we allow ourselves to experience anxiety as our natural response to change, and learn to modulate it, we’re able to live in the world as it is instead of struggling to make it what we want it to be. And as we get better at living with just enough anxiety, it becomes the energy that drives us forward, stretches us, and challenges us to be better tomorrow than we are today.

How can leaders manage anxiety instead of letting it manage them?

RR: It starts with self awareness. Leaders who understand what makes them anxious are better able to increase or decrease their anxiety, as needed to create just enough. But, more than that, it has to do with how they relate to change and uncertainty. By admitting what they can and can’t control, they’re able to take charge of their lives while remaining open to the unexpected. They’re at home in uncharted territory. Instead of seeing anxiety as the enemy, they recognize it as their natural companion on the path of change.


Rosen has placed on his web site a questionnaire to help you determine if you are a Just Enough Anxiety Leader.
Download a PDF of chapter 1: It's Time To Evolve

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:30 AM
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Making the Impossible Possible

Samuel Johnson once wrote, “The natural flights of the human mind are not from pleasure to pleasure, but from hope to hope.” This statement seems to define Bill Strickland’s life. Make the Impossible Possible is an engaging, inspirational book written with humility and passion.

Bill Strickland’s life changed, when as a boy in a Pittsburgh ghetto, a teacher took the time to show him that he mattered and allowed him to see himself in a new way. (An integral part of any leader’s job.) As a result, he became open to opportunities and created at 19 what became the Manchester-Bidwell Center, the now famous arts-education and job-training center for disadvantaged kids and adults. This extraordinary school was built on Strickland’s belief that “all of us have the potential to make our dreams come true, and that one of the greatest obstacles blocking us from realizing that potential is that we believe, or are told, that things we want most passionately are impractical, unrealistic, or somehow beyond our reach.” He convincingly demonstrates his belief that:

Each one of us, no matter who our parents are, where we live, how much education we have, or what kinds of connections, abilities, and opportunities life may have offered us, has the potential to shape our lives in ways that will bring us the meaning, purpose, and success we long for….I want everyone who comes to this book, no matter what their age or accomplishments or the circumstances of their lives, to rethink their assumptions about what is and isn’t possible in their lives, and to convince themselves that they have not only the right but also the responsibility, and the capacity, to dream big and to make those dreams come true.

Strickland narrates his successes and failures, obstacles and opportunities, his thinking and rethinking, as he went about to create the success he has achieved. It’s a fascinating story. While he has dedicated his life to helping other people, he denies the do-gooder label. He writes, “I didn’t do any of it out of selflessness. I did it to be myself. I did it to enrich my own life, to deepen the quality and meaning of my own experience. I did it because it was a part of what I had to do if I genuinely wanted to be me.”

How often have we been burdened by self-defeating assumptions? Strickland writes that “once we accept the idea that poverty is, essentially, the acceptance of meager possibility, we can’t deny that all of us are in some fashion poor. We all suffer some form of poverty—poverty of imagination, or courage, or vision, or will. We allow ourselves to be limited by our fears—fear of failure, fear of change, fear of being criticized or of looking like a fool.”

This isn’t another see-what-I-did self-help book. It’s a book that invites introspection. Read it and learn from his experience and thinking.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 02:41 PM
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Changing Your Nature

Personality and temperament are a group of traits that are only partly genetic. They are affected by social factors but remain stable throughout one’s life. But, while our basic personalities don't change significantly after childhood, our behavior can. Psychology Today reports that most traits – like optimism, passion and joy – can be changed. In Second Nature, author Kathleen McGowan, writes:

Tweaking the way you interpret and react to the world can be a transformative experience, freeing you up to act in new ways. At first, it feels awkward, even bizarre. But with new behaviors come new experiences, creating a feedback loop that, over time, reinforces the transition.

Some sought-after qualities are easier to develop than others. Courage, joy, passion, and optimism are among the more amenable to cultivation, but each requires mastering a different—and sometimes surprising—set of skills. To bring more joy and passion into your life, you must paradoxically be more open to experiencing sadness, anxiety, and fear. Learning to think like an optimist, it turns out, is less important than acting like one. And being courageous has nothing to do with how afraid you are: It's a matter of how strongly you feel about your goals. Cultivating these characteristics puts you on the road to that blend of happiness, satisfaction, and purpose that is the height of human functioning, what positive psychologists call "the good life."

British psychologist Daniel Nettle, author of Personality: What Makes You the Way You Are, writing for the BBC, states that when we watch how people respond differently to different circumstances, “something about the way the person is ‘wired up’ seems to be at work, determining how people react to situations, and, more than that, the kind of situations they get themselves into in the first place. This is why personality seems to become stronger as we get older; when we are young, our situation reflects external factors such as the social and family environment we were born into. As we grow older, we are more and more reaping the consequences of our own choices (living in places we ourselves have chosen, doing jobs that we were drawn to, surrounded by people like us whom we have sought out). Thus, personality differences that might have been very slight at birth become dramatic in later adulthood.”

While there is no one best personality to have, each has their advantages and disadvantages, we could do better by getting out of our programmed reactions and try to cover some new ground. Nettle recommends, “If you are an extreme introvert, you might want to challenge yourself to experience the rewards of greater spontaneity and exchange; if you are an extreme extravert, you might want to teach yourself to undertake a long and lonely project that will ultimately be very rewarding. As human beings, we have the unique ability to look in at our personality from the outside and decide what we want to do with it.”

Of Related Interest:
  Our Strengths Are Not to Be Indulged, But Managed
  You Can Change

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:20 AM
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Quarrel Not At All: The Stuff of Command

In President Lincoln: The Duty of a Statesman, the follow-up to Lincoln’s Virtues, William Lee Miller, writes that if you knew Lincoln before he became president, you knew that it was part of Lincoln’s character to be capable of overlooking slights to himself, but you might question whether he could, at the same time, “command armies and make the demanding decisions of a nation at war.”

The stuff of command, especially in a giant deadly conflict, would not seem ordinarily to combine well with the stuff of forbearance and generosity. Executive skill and vigor, like a surgeon’s skill, would appear to require a certain withdrawal of empathy. The resolution necessary to great statesmanship would appear to invite, if not even to require, a certain ruthlessness with those whose wills and complex humanity complicate, impede, and even defy one’s vigorously pursued purpose.

In a letter to Captain James M. Cutts who had been found guilty in a court-martial of conduct unbecoming of an officer of a gentleman, Lincoln offered this advice:

Quarrel not at all. No man resolved to make the most of himself, can spare time for personal contention. Still less can he afford to take all the consequences, including the vitiating of his temper and the loss of self-control.

Yield larger things to which you can show no more than equal right; and yield lesser ones, though clearly your own.

Miller writes:

Interpreting Lincoln, we might say: We overestimate our own interest, and we underestimate our adversary’s, so that the advice to yield on all small matters, and on all matters than even to our distorting eyes seem equally balanced, is a moral corrective. Here is a lawyer, and a politician, and a war leader in the midst of tremendous battles giving this surprising advice: quarrel not at all.

Lincoln was a man possessed magnanimity and discriminating judgment, who was able to rise above vindictiveness to win the battles that mattered most. Miller’s book on Lincoln holds many lessons for leaders of today. He shows how Lincoln learned to balance his strengths and weaknesses in a way that made him one of the greatest and most respected leaders in modern times.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:37 AM
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What to Do When Things Go Wrong

When things go wrong, we often begin by asking ourselves the wrong questions like “Why is this happening to me?” In QBQ, John Miller writes that “our first reactions are often negative, bringing to mind incorrect questions. But if in each moment of decision we can instead discipline our thoughts to look behind those initial questions and ask better ones (QBQ’s – the Questions Behind the Questions), the questions themselves will lead us to better results….The answers are in the questions.”

When a problem (or a challenge is you prefer) arises, we start looking for some control of the situation. The problem is, we quite naturally begin by looking at those around us and ask the wrong types of questions like “why?” and “who?” The wrong questions take away any control of the situation we might otherwise gain.

In LeaderShock, Greg Hicks suggests that we look for meaning in the situation first. Ask self-revealing questions like:

• What does it say about me that I have this problem—about my practices, my departmental policies, my relationship with customers and staff?
• What can I learn from this?
• How can I make this situation useful to me and my employees?

He adds, “You’re on shaky ground if you attempt to fix a problem without first understanding what it means to you and your organization. By looking for inherent meaning, you open a rich treasure chest of valuable gems that lead to new information, insight, and opportunities.”

John Miller stresses that the right questions contain an “I” and not “you,” “they,” and “them.” “I” questions lead to action. “Questions that contain an “I” turn our focus away from other people and circumstances and put it back on ourselves, where it can do the most good. We can’t change other people. We can’t control circumstances and events. The only things we have any real control over are our own thoughts and actions. Asking questions that focus our efforts and energy on what we can do makes us significantly more effective, not to mention happier and less frustrated.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:28 AM
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Are You Mature?

Tim Elmore of GrowingLeaders.com wrote an interesting article for his monthly Leadership Link newsletter, about maturity. He noted that for the most part, “this generation of kids is advanced intellectually, but behind emotionally.” Intellectually they are exposed to much more sooner than we ever were growing up. But their emotional development is stunted by well-intention parents that hover over their kids—sometimes referred to as helicopter parents—and deny them the necessary pain of maturation.

He also cited another reason. Scientists have found that from ages 11-14, kids lose some of the connections between cells in the part of their brain that enables them to think clearly and make good decisions. The brain is pruning itself. It’s ridding itself of ineffective and weak brain connections. This creates a situation where the brain is between the child brain and the not fully developed adult brain which forms around age 20.

Elmore asks, “What does this mean?” “Students today are consuming information they aren't completely ready to handle. The adult part of their brain is still forming and isn't ready to apply all that our society throws at it. Their mind takes it in and files it, but their will and emotions are not prepared to act on it in a healthy way. They can become paralyzed by all the content they consume. They want so much to be able to experience the world they've seen on websites or heard on podcasts, but don't realize they are unprepared for that experience emotionally. They are truly in between a child and an adult.”

Elmore lists the qualities that we should begin developing in our own kids (and we might look for in ourselves).

1. They are able to keep long-term commitments.
   One key signal of maturity is the ability to delay gratification. They can commit to continue doing what is right even when they don't feel like it.
2. They are unshaken by flattery or criticism.
   As people mature, they sooner or later understand that nothing is as good as it seems and nothing is as bad as it seems. Mature people can receive compliments or criticism without letting it ruin them or sway them into a distorted view of themselves. They are secure in their identity.
3. They possess a spirit of humility.
   Humility parallels maturity. Humility isn't thinking less of yourself. It is thinking of yourself less. Mature people aren't consumed with drawing attention to themselves.
4. Their decisions are based on character not feelings.
   Mature people--students or adults--live by values. They have principles that guide their decisions. Their character is master over their emotions.
5. They express gratitude consistently.
   I have found the more I mature, the more grateful I am, for both big and little things.
6. They prioritize others before themselves.
   A pathway out of childishness is getting past your own desires and beginning to live to meet the needs of others less fortunate.
7. They seek wisdom before acting.
   Finally, a mature person is teachable. They don't presume they have all the answers. The wiser they get the more they realize they need more wisdom.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 07:30 AM
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Correct Choices Are the Key to Success

As with Tracy’s Flight Plan, we are once again told that there are no shortcuts on the road to success. In Monday Morning Choices, David Cottrell reasonably claims that success is realized by making more good choices than bad ones and recovering quickly from bad choices when you do make them. Making good choices is the trick.

He divides success enhancing choices into 3 areas: Personal Choices (choices people make that will mold their character), Action Choices (choices that move you beyond just talking about what you want to do) and Investment Choices (those choices about investing in people who will make your life better). To help you to develop your skills for making good choices, he has designed a weekly Ben-Franklin-type program that addresses four key choices in each of the three categories. As Monday sets the tone for the rest of the week, he suggests starting each Monday morning with one of the areas and make a commitment to do something different as a result. In brief, the 12 key choices we all need to address are:

• The No-Victim Choice: Don’t let your past eat your future.
• The Commitment Choice: Be Passionate Enough to Succeed. Be willing to pay the price.
• The Values Choice: Success often brings enemies. Choose your enemies and your friends carefully.
• The Integrity Choice: Do the right thing.
• The Do-Something Choice: Choose to do something that will make a difference.
• The Persistence Choice: Learn from your mistakes.
• The Attitude Choice: Take the Enthusiastic approach.
• The Adversity Choice: Conquer difficult times. Explore workable alternatives.
• The Relationship Choice: Connect with success and be a mentor for others.
• The Criticism Choice: Embrace tough learning.
• The Reality Choice: Face the truth.
• The Legacy Choice: Be willing to share what you know.

Cottrell has a well thought out chapter devoted to each of the above choices. Each chapter has discussion questions that you can use with your own team each Monday morning.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:44 AM
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The Real Secret of Success

Brian Tracy has produced another level-headed book with Flight Plan. He correctly asserts that “Every year or two, someone comes along with a book like The Secret, suggesting that there is a quick and easy way to be happy and make a lot of money. According to The Secret, all you have to do is to think and visualize positive thoughts and you will attract into your life all the good things you want. This idea appeals to people who are unwilling to do the hard work that is necessary to achieve anything worthwhile.”

Success happens for a reason and it’s not wishful thinking. We are all subject to the Law of Cause and Effect: For every effect, there is a cause or causes. You get what you put in. It’s as simple as that. It’s not luck or mysterious forces. Actually, that should provide some comfort. It means that it is up to you. You’re in the driver’s seat. Tracy applies the principle well: “If you do what other successful people do, over and over again, nothing can stop you from eventually getting the same results that they do. Conversely, if you don’t do what other successful people do, nothing can help you.” That’s pretty straightforward.

Tracy lays out twelve steps to follow to help you determining and responding correctly to the many hundreds of choices in your journey through life that will help to create the results you’re looking for.

1. Choose Your Destination: What contribution will you make?
2. Review Your Flight Plan Options: You are only as free as your well-developed options. Continually develop options. Hope is not a strategy.
3. Write Your Flight Plan: Write down your goals and then resolve to do something every day, without exception, until your goal is achieved.
4. Prepare for Your Journey: Leave nothing to chance; plan for every eventuality.
5. Take Off at Full Throttle: This is the turning point. Your get out what you put in.
6. Plan for Turbulence: Don’t be surprised if you run into problems—everyone does.
7. Make Continual Course Corrections: You will have to make changes to deal with problems and opportunities that come up. It’s okay to change your mind.
8. Accelerate Your Learning and Progress: Never stop learning and upgrading your knowledge. Learning new skills that can increase your contribution is like stepping on the accelerator of your own potential.
9. Activate Your Superconscious Mind: When you relax completely and let your mind go blank, very often a superconscious idea emerges.
10. Avoid Shortcuts and Other Mirages: Be prepared to pay the full price for success.
11. Master Your Fears: The mastery of fear and the development of courage are essential prerequisites for a happy successful life.
12. Persist Until You Succeed: Persistence is the hallmark of success.

Tracy’s ideas are well worth putting into practice as you begin the new year. He writes, “Character is the ability to follow through on a resolution after the enthusiasm with which the resolution was made has passed.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 08:56 AM
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Konrad Lorenz on Reflection

In his book, Civilized Man’s Eight Deadly Sins, Austrian zoologist and Nobel Prize winner Konrad Lorenz, wrote of what is lost in man’s race against himself.

Anxious haste and hasty fear help rob man of his most essential properties. One of these is reflection. . . . A being unaware of the existence of its own self cannot possibly develop conceptual thought, word language, conscience, and responsible morality. A being that ceases to reflect is in danger of losing all these specifically human attributes.

One of the worst effects of haste, or the fear engendered by it, is the apparent inability of modern man to spend even the shortest time alone. He anxiously avoids every possibility of self-communion or meditation, as though he feared that reflection might present him with a ghastly self-portrait, such as that of Dorian Gray. The only explanation for the widespread addition to noise—paradoxical considering how neurasthenic people are today—is that something has to be suppressed. . . . I think he [is] only afraid of meeting himself.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:50 AM
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New Year's Resolution: Get Better

While it is true that some people just can’t be lead, more often than not, the situation calls for us to get better. Here’s a Taoist story retold in the leadership classic, Leaders: The Strategies for Taking Charge by Warren Bennis and Burt Nanus:

When Yen Ho was about to take up his duties as tutor to the heir of Ling, Duke of Wei, he went to Ch’u Po Yu for advice. “I have to deal,” he said, “with a man of depraved and murderous disposition. . . . How is one to deal with a man of this sort?”

“I am glad,” said Ch’u Po Yu, “that you asked this question. . . . The first thing you must do is not to improve him, but to improve yourself.”

Let's all resolve to get better.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:36 PM
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Applied Awareness

In one of this year’s outstanding leadership books, Apples Are Square, authors Susan and Thomas Kuczmarski interviewed Lambert & Associates vice-president of Client Affairs Brian Sorge about seeing what isn’t there.

“Understanding others involves not only paying attention to what they say, but also when they don’t say anything at all,” Sorge believes. “I have always been very emotionally intuitive and that is not easy. I think what happens is that you tend to take on people’s fear and struggles. It allows for tremendous empathy, but also tremendous stress. I remember during speech class in seventh grade, some of the kids would go up there and be so nervous, and I would get tears in my eyes because I could feel their nervousness. I loved getting up and talking to people and giving a speech and I had no problem with it, but I would feel their pain profoundly.”

The authors write, “Good leaders take on the problems of the team. They sense difficulties and out themselves not only in the minds, but also the hearts of those around them. This empathy allows them to develop meaningful solutions that impact people on a personal level.”

Sorge adds the most important component to all of this:

“So many people lack what I call applied awareness. You can give me all the awareness in the world, but you also have to be able to translate that into behavior. In corporate America, it is okay to talk about behavior, but difficult to get beyond talking. That level is not deep enough to make an impact. It allows people to feel like they are changing when they really are not. It is very superficial.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:16 AM
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Never Complain. Never Explain.

Christine Comaford-Lynch relates the following story in her book Rules for Renegades:

There was once a monk who lived in a tiny hut on a hill overlooking a village. He kept to himself, only coming down to the village for food. In that village a young woman had become visibly pregnant, and when her screaming father insisted on knowing who her lover was, she named the monk. An angry mob marched up the hill and stormed the monk’s hut.

“You are a disgrace to Buddhism!” they shouted. “All these years we’ve given you alms and now you impregnate one of our women! You should be ashamed! How dare you call yourself a holy man!”

“Is that so?” the monk said, and returned to his meditation.

Time passed, and the child was born. The young woman’s father again marched up the hill and handed the baby to the monk. “Here. You take care of your bastard child. You caused this problem, you live with the consequences.”

“Is that so?” The monk said. He accepted the child and returned to his meditation.

After a few weeks the young woman was overcome with remorse for falsely fingering the monk. She told her father that the monk was not her lover after all, that her true lover had left, and she wanted to raise the child on her own. Again her father marched up the hill, this time with townspeople in tow.

“Please forgive our mistake. We are so sorry. What a truly holy man you are for tolerating our cruel words and caring for this child. We will relieve you now of this burden. The Buddha himself is singing your praises in the higher worlds, all the higher beings are smiling down upon you, no greater monk has ever lived.”

“Is that so?” The monk said, and return to his meditation.

Whether people are praising you or trashing you, neither changes your intrinsic value. Don’t be easily swayed. It reminds me of a statement Henry Ford II once famously said, "Never complain. Never explain." It's good advice. (Although, he probably meant it more as a corollary to the Fifth Amendment than good advice for leaders.)

Complaining is the outward expression of inner frustration. A complaint acknowledges that something is not as we think it should be. (And that may or may not be true. Quite often we lack all of the pertinent information.) The problem is that we often begin to complain as if that will lead to a solution. It rarely does. Complaining is outward focused and is a form of blaming. The issue is internal. If you can fix the problem, then you should quietly fix it. If you can’t, you should change your perspective on it and move on.

Complainers generally have a lot to complain about because they are in fact, complainers. Complaining, explaining and excuse-making extend the time you are embroiled in the issue. It amplifies frustration—your own and others—spreads discontent and discord and generally makes you unpleasant. Jane Austin observed that "those who do not complain are never pitied." Pity however, is not the goal of a well-adjusted person let alone a leader. Of more value is novelist Cesare Pavese comment that "one stops being a child when one realizes that telling one's troubles does not make things better." Recognize your part, take responsibility and move on.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:47 AM
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Lord Sharman on Helping People Grow

Leading By Example is a concise little book of interviews with top leaders from various fields. Each interview in this new Harvard Business School series is followed by a list of takeaways. Here is an excerpt by Lord Sharman, chairman of the Aegis Group, on investing in people by understanding their strengths and nurturing them like a gardener with prized plants.

I’m very fond of gardening myself, and I’m fond of gardening examples. To some degree, developing people in an organization is impossible. You can’t develop them; they develop themselves, and so your job is like that of a head gardener. You figure out what the various microclimates are around the place, and then you figure out the qualities of the plants that you need to go into those microclimates. Similarly, you select the people based on their strengths and place them in those jobs. I’ve seen notes of appraisal interviews, which say that two-thirds of the interview is spent talking about what the guy’s not good at. Now, that’s great—I can’t imagine anybody coming out of an interview like that feeling anything other than very depressed.

What you want to do is spend time talking about what the person is good at and how he’s going to develop that. Sure, see whether you can do something about the weaknesses, but to my way of thinking, appraisal interviews should be two-thirds about what the person is good at and how those great assets can be used within the organization. If you look at good coaches in the sports field—and I’ve always been fascinated about how good coaches work—they don’t actually coach technique very often. The really good coaches are the ones that coach the mind and the attitude.

You’ll always have people that find it much easier to be critical than to be encouraging. The tome at the top has to be right. If you start criticizing your colleagues about what they’re bad at all the time rather than encouraging them, that’s sure as hell going to get down through the organization very quickly.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:15 PM
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Make it Great!

Phil Gerbyshak truly is a relationship geek. That is to say, he is someone who is passionate about creating and building relationships. And he does. From my own experience with him, he does practice what he preaches. He has produced a short little book titled, 10 Ways to Make it Great!. He has included 10+ lessons he has learned in his choice to make a life that is great. It is a choice we all have. Phil writes:

Make It Great! means it's my choice, which means it's your choice too. Whether you actually have a good day is not the important thing; what's important is how you choose to deal with the things that each day brings. Each encounter presents you with an opportunity to either let it pass by, or tackle it head on and truly Make It Great!

Phil makes an important point. It's relatively easy to have a great day when things are going your way. The discipline comes in when things aren’t going our way. It’s easy to use circumstances as an excuse as to why you couldn’t do what you know is right—“Don’t make me mad!” “I would have but they ….” The ball is always in your court. You can find Phil over at Make It Great!

Posted by Michael McKinney at 07:06 AM
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Taking It Personally

“Foolish is the person that takes offense when none was intended. More foolish is the person that takes offense when it was intended.”

The above statement rings true, because either way we lose. In egonomics, David Marcum and Steven Smith describe the difficulties that arise when we get our identity confused with the topic being debated—when we take things personally. When we get into a vigorous debate, it’s quite common to find that we respond to a perceived attack with behavior that indicates our ego is in trouble.

When we respond to a statement or question by comparing ourselves, seeking acceptance, showcasing or getting defensive, it often means that we think our identity is under attack. In other words, we forget about the debate of ideas and respond as though who we are is being threatened and we take it personally. It’s not unusual that we have a tough time separating our ideas from our identity? Trial attorney Gerry Spence explains, “We all have a personal image that he must protect. For example, I do not want to be seen by others, and particularly my myself, as weak, as ill advised, as less than worthy, as stupid, as someone who cannot be respected. I will do whatever is necessary to preserve my personal image of myself. The more fragile my self image, the harder I will struggle to preserve it.”

Marcum and Smith explain it this way: “If we can’t distinguish who we are from what we do, what we have, or who we do it with, we won’t see past our titles or tenure in a discussion. If we say to ourselves or others, ‘I’m the Vice President,’ ‘I’m the CEO,’ ‘I’m the Director of Public Relations,’ or even ‘I’m the creative one’ or ‘I’m the advocate for diversity here,’ then we’re parading our identity, and take it personally.”

In egonomics, Marcum and Smith examine an exchange between Fred Rogers and Senator John Pastore at a Congressional hearing to effectively explain this point. It clearly showcases the benefits of maintaining a separation between identity and ideas and keeping your ego in check with humility. They explain, “In the intensity of debate, humility is like a two-way surge protector; it keeps us from making it personal or taking it personally.”

Of course, the trick is to avoid this negative response cycle in the first place. The authors borrowed an idea from Carl Rogers to give form to an essential attitude to take when faced with a vigorous debate (or when dealing with people in general). The idea is to treat people with unconditional positive regard. That is to say that “everyone is worthy of respect and capable of contribution, even when they don’t particularly act that way or even feel that way about themselves.” We want to assure others that we aren’t trying to change who they are, but we are interested in presenting another viewpoint.

If you find yourself in a situation where things have gotten beyond productive, then the author’s suggest using one of the following opening statements before we begin asking questions:

“You might be right…”
“Even though that’s hard to hear, I’m glad you’re saying something…”
“Okay. Let’s talk that one through.”
“Say a little more about that.”

It doesn’t signal agreement, it expresses a mind open to understanding. Debate needs to follow understanding or people often begin to defend themselves and not their ideas.

Finally, in the spirit of vigorous debate and deepened understanding, humility prompts us to ask, “Who cares if I’m right at this instant if we get it right eventually?” If we’re devoted to progress, it doesn’t matter who has the answer, but that the answers are found.

In the balance of the book, Marcum and Smith show that shifting conversations from statements and judgments to exploration requires not just humility, but the relentless application of two more principles—curiosity and veracity. They maintain a good blog that is worth checking out also.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:33 AM
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My Life Feels Like a Three-Ring Circus

Here’s a book for organizations and individuals that struggle with “getting it all done.” That is to say, nearly all of us. Authors Jones Loflin and Todd Musig have put together a memorable and fast-paced story in Juggling Elephants. By bringing out principles designed to help you juggle the acts in your life, and demonstrating through examples, practical tools being applied in the life of the main character, Mark, this book delivers. Here are several of the principles in brief:

The result of trying to juggle elephants is that no one, including you, is thrilled with your performance.

The ringmaster cannot be in all three rings at once. “I have to give my full attention to the ring I am in an, when it’s time, I must move to the other ring as quickly as possible” said the ringmaster.

The key to the success of the circus is having quality acts in all three rings. What ring should you be focusing in on right now—work, relationships or self?

There is no shortage of acts for the circus. Every act must serve a purpose. “Choosing acts based on your purpose works best when it becomes a habit. It’s easy to make a wrong choice based solely on emotion, laziness, convenience, or pressure from others who don’t have a good understanding of your purpose. No matter who we are, we can’t do it all. That is why it is essential that every act must serve a purpose.” Tip: Leave room for interruptions.

The relationship between the ringmaster and the performers affects the quality of the circus. People have needs that extend way beyond the obvious ones. “An effective animal trainer recognizes that discipline is a small part of the training process. Getting to know the animal is much more important. Once he understands the animal, he can work with the animal’s personality instead of always trying to force the desired behavior. It’s the same with people. Once you get to know an individual, you can better understand how to fully engage their energies to accomplish a specific goal of task.”

Intermission is an essential part of creating a better circus performance. “Intermission is a time for the audience to mentally relax, physically stretch, and be better prepared for the second half.” We all need to regroup, renew and prepare.

Your circus is only as good as your next performance. Get feedback and actively pursue learning experiences. Take the time to get your act together.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 08:47 AM
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Four Warning Signs That Our Ego is Getting the Best Of Us

A managed ego is an important trait of the effective person. Authors David Marcum and Steven Smith state in their compelling book egonomics: What Makes Ego Our Greatest Asset (or Most Expensive Liability), that “surprising as it may sound, many people don’t have enough ego, and that leads to insecurity and apathy that paralyze cultures and leaders.” This is an important addition to our thinking about ego and worth examining in more depth. It does sound odd as no doubt, most of us have been told that ego is a bad thing. But an unbalanced ego—either overconfident or lacking in confidence—can trap people in bad thinking resulting in poor or damaging interactions with others.

egonomics offers four warning signs that our ego is getting the best of us:

1. Being Comparative “When we’re comparative, we tend to either pit our strengths against another’s weaknesses, which may lead us to an exaggerated sense of confidence, or we compare our weaknesses to their strengths, which can cause negative self pressure.
2. Being Defensive “When we can’t ‘lose,’ we defend our positions as if we’re defending who we are, and the debate shifts from a we-centered battle of ideas to a me-centered war of wills.”
3. Showcasing Brilliance “The more we want or expect people to recognize, appreciate or be dazzled by how smart we are, the less they listen, even if we do have better ideas.”
4. Seeking Acceptance “When we equate acceptance or rejection of our ideas with acceptance or rejection of who we are, we ‘play it safe.’ We tend to swim with the current and find a slightly different way of saying what’s already been said as long as acceptance is the outcome. That nor only makes us a bland follower, but an uninspiring leader.”

I believe that these four warning signs crop up in our lives and in the lives of those around us, due more to a lack of a proper ego than an oversized ego. More often than not, a person that appears egotistical is covering for insecurities than they are expressing a genuine belief in their superiority.

Humility isn’t the opposite of ego, but it plays a vital role in keeping it in balance. Marcum and Smith created the following diagram to help us to understand the equilibrium concept of humility.

The diagram graphically illustrates the two poles of ego and the grounding effect that humility plays to pull us back into a proper perspective. The authors define humility as the “intelligent self respect which keeps us from thinking too highly or too little of ourselves. It reminds us how far we have come while at the same time helping us see how far short we are of what we can be.”

Ego doesn’t suddenly pull us to the extremes and twist us overnight into egomaniacs, or lead us to believe we’re above the law. But once we’re in the habit of being off-center, we do slowly start to believe we’re above other things: reproach, being wrong, being questioned, the need to prove we’re right, having a bad idea, following the lead of others, and so on. Being consistently off-center leads us gradually toward the extremes.

When we lose control of ego, we lose “trust, respect, relationships, influence, talent, careers, clients, and market share. Each of us has occasionally, perhaps unknowingly, let ego weaken our talents despite our qualifications, expertise, charisma, track record, or remarkable ability.”

This is an important book that will be helpful to anyone trying to get a handle on their ego and understand it manifestations in themselves and others. egonomics is a book that every leader should read and one that we will return to again on this blog.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:32 AM
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Be Not a Scholar Confused By Your Own Learning

As one studies leadership, I am reminded of Louis Nizer’s words to be “a scholar who is not confused by his own learning.” It’s easy to get caught up in some of the theory, jargon and formulas and find the whole thing inaccessible but to the best minds. Don’t get me wrong, I believe that the books, training, and mentoring are essential to opening our minds to think in new ways. But ultimately, leadership development begins with self-knowledge and the development of a disciplined mind and character. It is specific to our varied own backgrounds and situations. There are hundreds of great tools to help you get there, but he only one that can begin the journey, is you.

The late great diplomat, Abba Eban once wrote, “An ‘expert’ is a man who understands everything—but nothing else. He sometimes becomes immune to the intangible but powerful human impulses that lie beneath the surface of his discipline.” Yet, it is in the “intangible but powerful human impulses that lie beneath the surface” where you will find leadership. Fortunately, that is accessible to everyone who makes the effort.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 11:07 AM
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You Can Change

When we take personality tests we need to understand that they are snapshots not indictments. They are a point to grow from. It’s easy to confuse behavior and personality. Personality is reflected in behavior. But, behavior can be changed. One may be especially competitive. However, one need not be boorish or rude.

In a recent TeleForum presented by LeadingNews, Marshall Goldsmith, author of What Got You Here Won’t Get You There, stated that personality testing can lead to stereotyping. To say my personality type is this and is unchangeable is wrong thinking. Executive coaches that believe that people can change are much more effective than executive coaches that do not believe people can change. This may seem like a “Duh!” moment, but it is surprising how many people talk about personality testing as though people cannot change. If you don’t believe people can change, coaching is the wrong business for you to be in.

Goldsmith commented on a common misconception surrounding the new emphasis we now see being placed in the build-on-your-strengths movement. The idea of building on your strengths is an effective life strategy but not an excuse. He stated:

The build-on-your-strengths idea makes total sense when it’s at the level of the occupation. For example, Tiger Woods should be a golfer, not a stand-up comedian. He’s building on his strengths becoming a golfer and he shouldn’t be a stand-up comedian. On the other hand, I think what happens on the build-on-your-strengths stuff, is people misinterpret it. So they would say, “Well, Tiger Woods is a great driver, so he doesn’t have to worry about putting. He can ignore his putting.” He really cannot ignore his putting. It’s part of his job. If you’re a leader and you’re great at strategy but terrible with people, you can’t just sit there; if your CEO, and say, “It doesn’t matter.” It does matter. It all matters. You can’t sit there an ignore part of your job and say “I’m not good at that therefore I have an excuse to ignore it.” All that does is reinforce a useless stereotype.

While most advocates of build-on-your-strengths do not encourage that, Goldsmith is right. The idea is often misinterpreted. We must build on our strengths and minimize activities that call upon our weaknesses, but our weaknesses have to be dealt with. And that requires some behavior modification. Too often it can be taken an excuse to do-your-own-thing and not a position to grow and learn from. We can’t let ourselves fall into the trap of saying, “That’s just the way I am” because it’s hard to change. It may be the way you are, but you can be better. You can grow if you decide to. As a leader you have an obligation to.

Mark Sanborn said in a recent interview that he thinks most of us “sell ourselves short in terms of the impact that we can have in the world or in the marketplace, or in our homes and communities. We all have the opportunity, and maybe to a degree, an obligation, to take whatever talents we've been given and develop them to the fullest, so that we can more positively benefit and contribute to others.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:20 AM
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Max DePree on the Good Work of Leadership

Max DePree reminds us in Leadership Jazz that developing one’s leadership just in terms of corporate or institutional needs is not enough. Leaders need to be developing the whole person; polishing all of their gifts. He writes, “Leaders deal in substance and the quality of life, deaf to the calls to pursue quantity and appearances.”

Polishing our gifts isn’t something we should try to do on our own. Nor is it just about us. It’s also about the people around us.

The process first requires that we have an accurate view of ourselves to know who we are and what we believe in. One question DePree asks himself is “What do my family and I need to cultivate to reach our potential?” It becomes a process of broadening and deepening ourselves and through us, those close to us. “Good leadership includes teaching and learning, building relationships and influencing people, as opposed to exercising one’s power.” He suggests the following activities:

• Make a parallel track for responsible work in your life
• Practice leadership without power — serving on a school board or coaching tee-ball
• Learn your language and use it with respect
• Learn to communicate in public
• Participate regularly in an intellectual pursuit
• Learn who and what gives you health
• Begin to ponder seriously ideas for a second—or third—career
• Ask yourself frequently, “What truly gives meaning to my life?”

He writes, “A rising level of din threatens to drown out the voices urging us to do the good work of leadership, part of which is polishing gifts. This din takes the form of distractions, addictions, and institutional politics. . . . By moving personally and organizationally toward restraint and simplicity, we give ourselves a chance. It really comes down to setting priorities, as banal as that phrase has become.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 08:55 AM
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Fast versus Busy in the Age of Speed

Speed aficionado Vince Poscente says we are looking at speed from the wrong perspective. While living in a more-faster-now culture can be a little daunting, it also has the power to enrich our lives by making room for more significant things. In The Age of Speed he writes, “When we harness the power of speed, we not only get more and get it faster, but our lives and work become less stressful, less busy, and more balanced.” Crazy idea you say?

We like speed when we’re demanding it. We are not so fond of it when it is being demanded of us. You can’t have it both ways. If we want speed, we also have to deliver it. Poscente says though, that it doesn’t necessarily mean that we have to be buried under more work, more responsibilities and more demands.

We actually can do more in a given time than we could even five years ago. Therefore, the expectations we face to produce faster are often valid. But we don’t have to work harder or work longer hours to accomplish more.

“So,” Poscente asks, “why do people become irritated and rail against the expectation to speed up?” Here’s the key:

Perhaps it’s because we don’t often use the extra time for more rewarding experiences. Frequently, when we reduce the time it takes to do something insignificant, we end up using the saved time on yet another insignificant activity. If you figure out a way to save time at the bank and the grocery store, for example, do you earmark that time for something more rewarding, or do you just fill that time passively with other responsibilities that pop up? The latter scenario would leave anyone feeling exhausted, burnt out.

I think we have all been guilty of that. He explains:

Speed is a great solution for increasing income and productivity, but those benefits are only one piece of the picture. The bigger reason we should speed up is to make time for meaningful experiences. Speed is not just the way to get more work done—speed is the secret to having time to do what we want.

Poscente say we can speed up and still have the time to smell the roses. We need to know when speed will and will not benefit us. Are there ways you can approach what you do in a different way that would allow you to spend more time with your priorities, strengths, talents, and passions?

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:46 AM
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The Power of Thinking Twice

Human freedom involves our capacity to pause, to choose the one response toward which we wish to throw our weight.

—Rollo May

Les Parrott claims that “three seconds separate those who ‘give it their all’ from those who ‘don’t give it a thought’ — literally. Three seconds. This brief buffer is all that stands between those who settle for ‘whatever’ and those who settle for nothing less than ‘whatever it takes.’”

In his book, 3 Seconds: The Power of Thinking Twice, he presents six impulses that never pay off. The impulse to …

Give up before trying . . . because we feel helpless.
Shun a challenge . . . because it seems daunting.
Settle for the status quo . . . because we lack vision.
Shirk responsibility . . . because it’s easier to shift blame.
Do the mere minimum . . . because that’s all that’s expected.
Avoid taking action . . . because we fear failure.

If we routinely don’t give any one of these a second thought, they can lead us to lives of mediocrity. From Parrott’s perspective, it comes down to taking a moment to leverage the three seconds it takes to decide whether to behave in a manner consistent with what you really want or to give in to one of these self-sabotaging impulses.

Fundamental to all of this is taking personal responsibility. “And many times, you have to shoulder the blame, not because you personally did anything wrong, but on behalf of the company. The best way to do this us to focus not on who’s wrong, but on what’s wrong.”

Taking ownership for something often involves an apology. But a simple “I’m sorry” will sound hollow unless you’ve taken the three elements of an apology into account. First, you’ve got to understand what’s wrong. Get what’s wrong right. Second, you then have to admit to it. “Don’t make anyone drag an admission of what’s wrong out of you.” Finally, you need to rectify the situation. You need to do something to try to make the situation better. I would add that not all wrongs can be righted. Nor should we expect them to be. It is a very inward-directed individual that always demands their pound-of-flesh.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:08 AM
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It's Not About Me?!?

In The Ring in the Rubble, Gary Brandt brings up something that can hold us back from defining our problem, immobilize us, and block us from finding solutions. It’s an attitude that is easy to slip into and the last thing we want mentioned when we are in trouble. But if we can deal with it now, we can have a better chance of avoiding it when we are in trouble. He writes:

We tend to think that what we see is reality, and to forget that there is a much bigger world out there that, if we considered it, would put our situation into perspective. When we forget this, we tend to take our own perspective a little too seriously, and in the process, we take ourselves too seriously as well.

Brandt suggests that a well-developed sense of humor makes a good antidote.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 08:25 AM
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Dilenschneider: Power and Influence

Public relations guru Robert Dilenschneider’s excellent new book, Power and Influence: The Rules Have Changed, is worth your time because it is filled with a lifetime of wisdom about how to get along with others—a skill that is at the heart of leadership. He presents ten rules to think about and apply variously to your own situation. I think the most important ideas coming from these rules revolve around how to adapt to your changing world and situation, the importance of knowing how to be relentless and the need for civility and humility.

Rule Four is Seize the Opportunity in Every Crisis. All of us experience some crisis of one form or another, at any given moment in our lives. The big question is how we handle it. Dilenschneider writes, “The ability to survive in an uncertain time is critical…. [A] big part of power lies in knowing the moment to move. It’s not being all over he place all the time; it’s knowing that one critical instant to move, taking action, and getting the result.” He asked his friend, power player Alan Goodman how he viewed power players and their ability to respond to a crisis:

They are not impressed with power, and they are not concerned with power. They are concerned with ideas and impact. To me, that’s the biggest lesson I’ve learned from the people I’ve met. Their focus, and the focus of any of us that are lucky enough to lead an institution, has got to be what you do with it. How you make the world less dangerous, how you make your community a better place, how you energize people to get their ideas, because you don’t have all the ideas yourself. The best leaders focus on getting the best ideas and then doing something with them.

Here’s a few other lessons from Dilenschneider:

LESSON:  For a power player, it’s important to reach out to the shoeshine boy as well as the CEO. In fact, sometimes it’s more important to reach out to the shoeshine boy so that the CEO sees that you’re a person of the people, a person who’s generous, who’s humble, who’s willing to do outreach.

LESSON:  What is it like to be with these men and women of power? With the best of them, it is terrific because they are essentially humble people who understand their own shortcomings.

LESSON:  Keep your friendships, nurture them, and don’t expect anything in return. At the same time, when someone else has a problem, help that person instead of shying away from him or her. Most people tend to look at people with problems and say, “I want to avoid those people.” The time to go to people is when they’re down and out. They are unlikely ever to forget your goodwill.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:58 AM
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What Should I Be Thinking About?

Mark Sanborn (author of, among other things, You Don't Need a Title to be a Leader) wrote a good post on his blog about digging a little deeper to find those things to think about that will really make a change in our lives. We often don’t give attention to those things that have become familiar to us. Familiarity breeds contempt and so we tend to gloss over those things in search of the big thing. In actuality, it is the little everyday life issues, that when acted upon, will have the greatest long-term effect on our life.

Sanborn challenges us with an important question: “What in my life, that I can influence or control, should I be giving serious thought to today? That would include things like relationships, family issues, financial planning, career choices, health and exercise, and one of my favorites, the difference between activity and accomplishment.”

He adds, “The agenda set by print and broadcast media don’t always focus us on what we need to be thinking about. The only person who can determine the appropriate thinking agenda for your life is you.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 04:12 PM
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Letting Go of Worry About the Future and Resentment From the Past

Gary Brant asks us in his book The Ring in the Rubble, to look at how we are perceiving change in our life. He writes that “change is the great equalizer; it affects all of us. Organizations that view change as an opportunity and aggressively seek to find and capitalize on it, win. Those who don’t fall behind and are doomed to forever play catch-up.

“This applies to your personal life as well. Whether you’re facing a new marriage, divorce, birth, death, or illness, it’s not the change itself that dictates the results we get, it’s how we perceive and handle that change that makes all the difference."

For his metaphor, “the ring represents the valuable opportunities that change always creates. The rubble symbolizes the disruption, fear, and uncertainty that change almost always stirs up. My goal is to help you find the rings in the rubble of whatever changes you face, both at work and at home.”

Our perceptions of events in our life are based on how we view our world – our attitude. Sometimes our attitude is based in reality, but you would be surprised how often it is not. Often these false assumptions block us – and our organizations - from seeing things as they are and advancing to our full potential. Brant asks a series of questions to help us get at the emotional issues of regret and worry that are holding us back from taking positive action that is worth reviewing from time to time:

1. What are you holding on to that in reality is holding you down or holding you back?
2. What are you worrying about incessantly that hasn’t happened yet?
3. What do you gain by holding on to the past or worrying about the future?
4. Are you willing to feel vulnerable by setting down your sacks of regret (“Only if”) and worry (“What if?”)? Ultimately, who is hurt if you refuse to surrender them?
5. What is one thing that you can do in the next 24 hours that will lighten your load? Write it down and/or tell someone about it to help hold yourself accountable for carrying it out.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:03 AM
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Seeking Balance

I wanted to share some of the commencement remarks by Columbia University president Lee Bollinger as I found them valuable to life and leadership. He is speaking of the importance of seeking balance in our life. He says, “Life is always a matter of seeking a balance, a balance that’s right for the world and a balance that’s right in our personal lives. Life is almost never perfect, only in balance or out of balance.”

Bollinger stresses the role imagination plays in finding and maintaining that balance. Here are some edited excerpts to provide a little food for thought:

[Imagination] is something different from knowing things and being able to reason. It’s the part of the mind that creates stories, that feels what it’s like to be someone else (and so much so that for a moment you become that other person), that grasps the essence of a human dilemma, that eagerly absorbs the complexities of complex matters, that can see how people change in different circumstances, that is always trying to improve on things, that can conceive of a world different from the one we are living in.

We hear it from our Nobel Prize-winning economist Edmund Phelps, who teaches us that mental stimulation, problem-solving, and personal growth are the sine qua non of a thriving economy.

This is the key point: Our imaginations have trouble seeing their potential, and can do so only when we try ourselves and then compare our achievement against a greater achievement, and then repeat the process again and again.

Our New Age is so very much in need of imagination. The potential, as we have said, is so high now at the beginning, yet the problems ahead are already so massive, too. When the Arctic sea loses a chunk of ice the size of Texas, we have a sense things are not in balance.

When a billion people still have none of the benefits of modernity and face premature death and a life of squalor, we know things are not yet in balance.

When millions of people have stagnant incomes or face the dislocations of loss of employment, because of the shifting patterns of trade, we know there is still much too much imbalance.

When we barely understand the history, religious and cultural beliefs, and aspirations of other major societies around the globe, we know we have an imbalance of trade in knowledge.

And if the world — or our own lives — seem out of balance, it may be because the temptation to see things in a simple binary form — up or down, good or evil, right or wrong — is stoked every day by a culture that wants us to do anything but think too hard about the issues that matter so much.

Seeking balance too, requires keeping a long term view and personal integrity with our values and beliefs. Even in thinking about today’s big issues, it’s all too easy to jump on the band wagon of the latest speech, the newest study, or an organization’s well-rehearsed agenda. These issues are complex and need to be thought through in a well-ordered manner.

Leader’s need to encourage balance in those they lead too. Lack of balance in the workplace leads to many of the hidden costs organizations face—sick days, mistakes and burnout. On a personal level, it’s important to step back and ask yourself if in your drive for personal “success,” if you are paying too big a price in your relationships with those around you, your family, friends, your health and your own personal development.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 01:04 PM
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Career Planning: Do it Directionally

Norman R. Augustine, retired chairman and CEO of Lockheed Martin Corporation, advises you not to plan your career too carefully or in too much detail because you might miss the opportunities right in front of you. The best you can do is to know generally where you are going and be prepared for anything. He writes in Augustine’s Travels, “It’s just not useful in my experience, to try to plan an entire career in detail. There are just too many changes ahead, too many things that are going to happen that you can’t anticipate.”

He shares a story told to him by Don Fisher, founder of the Gap:

Some Years ago, Fisher, who was in the real estate business, went to a store and bout a pair of Levis. In too much of a hurry to try them on, when he got home he discovered they were an inch too short. He took them back, but the store where he’d bought them had such a small selection that they couldn’t accommodate him. Knowing that the ubiquitous Levis had to be stockpiled somewhere, he became so frustrated that it gave him an idea.

He called the company at its headquarters in San Francisco and offered them a deal: If they would agree to supply him, he would open a store that had the largest selection of their products ever offered for sale in one spot. Fine, said the company, and thus the Gap was born. Don later told me, “If my pants had been an inch longer. I’d still be in real estate instead of owning The Gap!”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:13 AM
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The New Golden Rule

Do we need a new Golden Rule? It’s not uncommon to find in modern literature, the call for a new golden rule. Is the Golden Rule adequate in today’s world?

The Golden Rule says, “Do unto others as you would have them do unto you.” Some would say that this just isn’t enough: in our global village, we need to consider cultural differences and the desires of others. This thinking suggests that we humans have never found ourselves in a multicultural setting before now.

The new Golden Rule goes something like this: Do unto others as they would have you do unto them. The need for a change really reflects a narrow view or understanding of the original intent of the Golden Rule. In fairness, calls for a new rule points to the very real need to explain the intent of the original. That it should and would need to be explained properly to each succeeding generation is a fact of life.

It should be noted that the term “Golden Rule” does not come from the Bible. However, the Bible does say that whatever you want men to do to you, do also to them. The rule has been stated in many ways for millennia. Almost 4000 years ago, written on papyrus, we have from the Egyptian story, The Tale of the Eloquent Peasant, "Do for one who may do for you, that you may cause him thus to do." Similarly, the Roman statesman and philosopher Seneca instructed leaders to "Treat your inferiors as you would be treated by your superiors." (Epistulae morales ad Lucilium 47:11) Clearly, human nature hasn’t changed much.

Rules are tools designed to get our thinking and behavior to a place that we might not naturally go to on our own. As a rule, the Golden Rule is no different. It is an attempt to guide us to the thinking behind the rule so that it is manifested in our behavior.

The Golden Rule is an introduction to a lesson on responsibility, awareness, ethics and outgoing concern for others. The principle the rule is trying to get at is one of selfless service to others. We naturally look at things from our own vantage point. So it’s not surprising that we look at the rule selfishly as well—from our own viewpoint.

The rule has within it the implicit instruction to treat others thoughtfully—in the same manner of outgoing concern—as you would like them to treat you. Certainly none of us would want others to treat us in a way that shows disregard for our personal needs and feelings. The principle of the Golden Rule is selflessness. It is not meant to imply that you should do for others exactly what you want them to do for you. It’s not about you.

This rule is about how to treat others. It’s not a manipulative behavior to get others to do something for you. It’s an approach to how you should be treating others regardless of how they treat you. It’s not a training behavior to get others to do a specific act for you. “I did this for you, so now you should do this for me.” We are to treat others—in the same manner—as we would like to be treated by anyone we come into contact with.

The Golden Rule is a lesson that can hardly be introduced to children soon enough. It’s a prescript that should be followed throughout life. This is a tall order, but something every leader should strive to develop. It is the essence of service and servant leadership. Properly understood, the Golden Rule encompasses cultural and personal differences.

Certainly, the intent of modern literature on this issue is to jog our thinking from a self orientation to an other orientation in our dealings with others. As is, the Golden Rule, if practiced, would go a long way to improving our relationships.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:05 AM
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Developing a Respectful Mind

Howard Gardner writes in Five Minds for the Future, "Adolescents have potentials for leadership, or for enterprise, that can be marshaled for diverse ends; it is up to their elders—parents, educators, community leaders, slightly older and more mature peers—to influence how these potentials are mobilized." This is a significant thought worthy of repeated reflection. It describes the process of character development throughout our lives. We might consider what functions we occupy and the influence we are having on others.

In any event, Gardner believes that the mobilization of these potentials should progress in five directions that can be manifested in five minds. They are: the disciplined mind (a mind trained on a specific scholarly discipline, craft or profession), the synthesizing mind (a mind that can create value from information), the creating mind (a mind that can break new ground), the ethical mind (a mind that contemplates meaning in work and life and then acts on it) and the respectful mind (a mind that welcomes differences between group and individuals).

Looking specifically at the respectful mind, he writes that “rather than ignoring differences, being inflamed by them, or seeking to annihilate them through love or hate, [he] would call on human beings to accept the differences, learn to live with them, and value those who belong to other cohorts.”

The respectful mind, like the other four qualities of mind, Gardner believes is a kind of thinking or attitude we will need to have to thrive during the eras to come. He says “eras to come” because while we have always needed this quality of mind, it has been a kind of option. Meaning I assume, that the repercussions of not having it were better contained in times past. However, today we are so interconnected that our very survival depends on it. In a global sense he is right.

While all of these minds interact with each other, the respectful mind, I believe, would seem to be the cornerstone. Without it we limit our input—distance ourselves from reality—and virtually assure that we are not effective with others. Consequently, the respectful mind is the first mind we should seek to develop in children and demand from ourselves.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:22 AM
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Do You Have All the Answers?

The acting President of the United States, on the Fox TV show 24, made a comment regarding leaders and followers that we all—celebrity or not—should consider before trying to weigh-in on the decisions that any of our leaders make. We all too often offer opinions on what should have been done in hindsight based on such limited information. This doesn’t mean that we should be blind followers, but that any criticisms we have, should be tempered with humility and an understanding that the information we have at our disposal is most often simplistic at best. We should judge the way we would want to be judged.

Noah Daniels reflected, “You know Tom, it’s easy to think you’ve got all the answers when none of the ultimate responsibility lies with you. But sittin’ in this chair.… Until you sit in this chair, you don’t know anything.”

In this regard you might be interested in an excellent post by Michael Watkins on the Harvard Business site: Welcome to the Panopticon: Are Leaders Under Too Much Scrutiny?

Posted by Michael McKinney at 08:49 AM
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Embracing The Dip

Seth Godin is a perennial favorite because he is among other things, what Saul Bellow called, a first class noticer. He gathers information and makes valuable and practical meaning from it. He doesn't skip the hard questions. His new book The Dip: A Little Book That Teaches You When to Quit (and When to Stick) is no exception.

What is The Dip you ask? Seth defines it as “the long slog between starting and mastery. It's any rough patch you have to get through before achieving your big goal . . . if in fact you're chasing the right goal.” This short read – 86 pages – is really about understanding what needs to be done to make the move from mediocrity to greatness. It's about quitting what gets in the way of you being the best. As Seth points out, it takes a lot more than saying, "I want to be the best." It also means letting go of those things that for you are dead-ends. Quitting those things where you are wasting your time and energy and refocusing your resources in The Dip – that place where you can achieve the greatest accomplishment. This isn’t a new idea, but it is the best, most memorable presentation I have ever seen of it.

Strategic quitting is the secret of successful organizations. Reactive quitting and serial quitting are the bane of those that strive (and fail) to get what they want. And most people do just that. They quit when it’s painful and stick when they can’t be bothered to quit.

Finding and successfully moving through your Dip is really a matter of counting the cost. Consider first, if you have the resources to carry on and then, if you succeed, is it worth the effort?

The Dip is why everyone is not doing what you're doing. It is also why you are not the “best in the world” at what it is you do. It’s where most people get stuck. Anything worth doing has a Dip. The Dip is actually a good place to be Seth says, because if you can get through it, you can win where most others quit. So, you want to find your Dip.

It’s the incredibly difficult challenges (the Dips) that give you the opportunity to pull ahead.

If you’re looking for some inspiration you might try reading New Ideas from Dead CEOs by Todd Buchholz. He writes: “Each of these CEOs failed at some point. Faced with bankruptcy and defections, they could have succumb to psychological depression or the siren call of politicians offering class warfare. He each heard nos, the tsk-tsks of friends, and a schadenfreude chorus scoffing at their failure. But they pushed on, energized by passion, ego, money, and the promise of glory. You cannot build a successful business or economy on the kindness of strangers. These CEOs relied on more dependable, more human drives. Drives that took them on fascinating rides.” In short, they embraced the Dip.

Here’s a tip. If you can’t measure your progress, if you feel like you are working harder and harder to get nowhere, then you’re probably putting your efforts into a dead-end initiative. You have the wrong strategy. You need to let go and find your Dip. With a little introspection, this has the potential to be a life changing book. Take the time to read it and apply it. You can read it in one sitting but you’ll think about it for days.

A few people will choose to do the brave thing and end up the best in the world. Informed people will probably choose to do the mature thing and save their resources for a project they’re truly passionate about. Both are fine choices. It’s the last choice, the common choice, the choice to give it a shot and then quit that you must avoid if you want to succeed.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:15 AM
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First, Take a Look at Yourself

When things aren't going right we tend to look around for the cause of the problem and blame others. What we should be doing is looking at ourselves.

One skunk's Ah-Ha experience:

"I always thought they didn't want me around because I was a skunk, well...you know it turns out they didn't want me around because I was a jerk."

—Reeko (the Skunk), Stuart Little 3: Call of the Wild

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:06 AM
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The Courage to Initiate

Relying on a single person to lead the charge reflects a dysfunctional concept of leadership. It sets up expectations that can’t be met. No one person can do everything. No wise leader would. Leadership is a group activity. There is an implied interdependency.

Everyone has the capacity for leadership. Often what most people lack is the courage—the courage to initiate. Initiative means moving outside your comfort zone. It means seeking out opportunities and being willing to act.

Nearly everyone can see a need or see where changes need to be made. What is uncommon though, are people who are willing to take the initiative; to do something about it. Leadership is not always seen in the brightest or the most talented, but it is always found in the courageous.

You may not be able to be the CEO but you should think as the CEO. The CEO mindset involves taking the time to think about the forces that are shaping the future of both you and your organization. Managing yourself in this way is important not only to the organization but also to your own personal development.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 08:35 AM
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Tyranny of the Urgent

It is easy to succumb to the tyranny of the urgent. There is always something competing for our attention. Worse still we might find we have to deal with what Michael Watkins calls pyromaniacs—those people like to create fires for you to put out. The only way out is to get some perspective. In White Hat Leadership, author Ty Warren writes about the importance of making time to disengage:

Part of preparing to lead is recognizing when to step away to recharge. Most of us have experienced the benefits of taking time away from the office (or family) for a few days, then returning with new energy and a better perspective.

Stepping away allows us to work through issues and problems without the stress induced by a sense of urgency. It is usually in these moments of relaxation that we generate objective solutions. We must go away to return with clarity.

Those who feel task saturated are the very people who need to step away most.

Leaders must have time to think or they will likely forfeit their ability to lead. Task saturation causes us to react rather than respond. Reaction is a mechanical, almost involuntary reflex to events. It comes from the primal areas of the brain and does not involve real thought. Response is initiated from the cognitive regions of the brain. Reaction is normal for the task-saturated person; response comes from the leader who makes certain to allocate time for cognitive consideration.

The urgent will always be with us. How we handle it will determine how effective we are. Michael Watkins offers five strategies to help you deal with the urgent on his blog.

Once we begin to let the urgent take over the important we loose perspective and get sucked into a cycle that perpetuates the problem and drains us. Without direction, we mistakenly find ourselves trying to compensate by going twice as fast. We must take time out to think. The perspective you gain will help you to handle everything you do better.

Are you part of the problem? Do you create fires for others to put out? Take the “Are you a pyromaniac?” quiz.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 04:51 PM
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Talent is Never Enough

“Talent is cheaper than table salt. What separates the talented individual from the successful one is a lot of hard work.”

—Stephen King

In John Maxwell’s valuable new book, Talent is Never Enough, he cites Peter Drucker on effectiveness, "There seems to be little correlation between a man's effectiveness and his intelligence, his imagination, or his knowledge...Intelligence, imagination, and knowledge are essential resources, but only effectiveness converts them into results. By themselves, they only set limits to what can be contained." "If talent were enough," Maxwell writes, "then the most effective and influential people would always be the most talented ones. But that is often not the case."

Talent might get you noticed but it won’t keep you there. Success requires hard work. To achieve the effectiveness that Drucker is talking about and to turn talent into results is matter of choice. Maxwell writes, “The key choices you make—apart from the natural talent you already have—will set you apart from others who have talent alone.” He has identified 13 choices you can make to maximize your talent. These choices form the framework of his book:

• Belief lifts your talent: Lack of belief in yourself can act as a ceiling on talent.

• Passion energizes your talent: A passionate person with limited talent will outperform a passive person who possesses greater talent.

• Initiative activates your talent: Socrates said, “To move the world we must first move ourselves.”

• Focus directs your talent: Attempting everything, like attempting nothing will suck the life out of you.

• Preparation positions your talent: Becoming more intentional. You can claim to be surprised once; after that, you’re unprepared.

• Practice sharpens your talent: Practice demands discipline and embracing change.

• Perseverance sustains your talent: People who display perseverance keep a larger vision in mind as they toil away at their craft or profession.

• Courage tests your talent: As we develop our talent and grow to our potential we will be tested continually. Courage is an everyday virtue.

• Teachability expands your talent: Teachability is not so much about competence and mental capacity as it is about attitude. It is the desire to listen, learn, and apply. Talented people can be the toughest to teach because they often think they know it all. It’s a problem of pride.

• Character protects your talent: People cannot climb beyond the limitations of their character. Talented people are sometimes tempted to take shortcuts. Character prevents that.

• Relationships influence your talent: Life is too short to spend it with people who pull you in the wrong direction. And it’s too short not to invest in others. Your relationships will define you.

• Responsibility strengthens your talent: Responsibility not only improves your life, but also will improve the life of those around you.

• Teamwork multiplies your talent: Teamwork divides the effort and multiples the effect.

“Make these choices,” Maxwell encourages, “and you can become a talent-plus person. If you have talent, you stand alone. If you have talent plus, you stand out.”

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:54 AM
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Blind Spots: The Strategies for Clear Sight

What are blind spots? Claudia Shelton, author of Blind Spots: Achieve Success by Seeing What You Can't See, explains that they “are patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving we often do unconsciously that can negatively influence our relationships with other people. They often show up when we are under stress and overuse our greatest strengths. So why are blind spots a big deal? Blind Spots can become possible problems in our working processes and relationship and if left unchecked, they can become serious obstacles to our progress.

Shelton has developed a plan to help us develop what she terms Clear Sight by first recognizing our blind spots and then turning them into strengths. This book is an excellent tool to help you to see yourself differently and thereby increase your self-awareness. What you don’t see is holding you back. She presents five strategies for turning each of the five most common blind spots into strengths. Here is an overview:

Identify Your Strengths
Not being clear about your strengths is a major blind spot. It can undercut your confidence and reduce your energy and vitality. Your strengths are the anchor of your self-confidence.

Check Old Habits
Old habit blind spots are often developed in adolescence when they prove successful in helping us reach our adolescent goals. Blind spots may keep us from realizing that these old habits are not part of who we are; they are just habits that do not serve today’s goal. They block us from developing a clear sense of who we are. Old habits are hard to recognize because they are so familiar to us and so comfortable.

Address Stress
We may be experiencing stress that we believe others can’t see. They do see it and it interferes with our goals and relationships. Importantly she cautions, “Constant unchecked stress can make us inflexible, overusing our strengths, increasing our blind spots, and undercutting our relationship every day.” We most often negatively express the stress we feel by criticism, anger and mood swings.

Tune Your Radar
We need to be aware of the nonverbal cues we send out, as well as recognize the non-verbal cues others are sending. When we communicate conflicting non-verbal signals, we lose influence. “When our radar is tuned, we synchronize what we say with how we say it in a way that has positive impact.”

Connect With Others
Our integrity and trustworthiness are often perceived by our ability to connect with other people effectively. “Connection is more than just information sharing….To connect, we need to be able to bring ourselves into the present moment.”

Shelton provides techniques to help you with the principles outlined here. She suggests however, that you focus on only one or two at a time as more than that can become a bit overwhelming.

A Blind Spots Profile and a Blind Spots 360° questionnaire and Workbook are available for purchase on the WhatsMyBlindSpot web site. The tool helps individuals to recognize their strengths—and the potential blind spots that can appear when those strengths are overused. in advance so they can stay working from their strengths. It can be done free (short version) or for $34.99 (long version with early warning signs for blind spots and plans of attack to turn them into strengths) by going to the WhatsMyBlindSpot web site.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:58 AM
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Our Strengths Are Not to Be Indulged, But Managed

In Marcus Buckingham’s latest book, Go Put Your Strengths to Work, he presents three myths that we need to deal with in order to make the most of our strengths. The first myth is, “As you grow, your personality changes.” The truth Buckingham says is, “As you grow, you become more of who you already are.” As it is presented, there could be some confusion. There are a few issues that need to be considered.





There is personality, there is behavior and there are attitudes. Although they are dependent on each other and intertwined, they are not all the same thing. In any discussion about any one of them, we have to be careful what we are talking about.

We all have traits that become more apparent as we grow and develop. These traits and talents—strengths—do not change over our lifetime. On the other hand, our behavior and attitudes can be altered, overhauled, modified, transformed or ignored. A scrooge can become generous. An approach that says, “Hey, that’s just the way I am” is a recipe for self-destruction.

Buckingham contends that "as you grow, you don't change into somebody else .... Personality tests confirm this. Much as we would like to believe that we change as we grow, if we take a personality test twice separated by many years, the results from the two tests are almost exactly the same." This is true. However, what we are, how we are perceived, how we relate to others, is determined by and large by how we see ourselves and our world, how we see or filter our experiences—our attitude—and how we act based on what we think—our behavior.

We may be competitive by nature—our personality—but we need not behave in such as way as to be obnoxious, rude, inconsiderate or demanding. We need not see everything as an opportunity to conquer. We can develop that trait or strength into an asset or we can let it rule our lives by letting it run amok to the point where we become the jerk that Bob Sutton describes in his book, The No Asshole Rule. If we allow it, our strength sabotages us and ends up holding us back from achieving our potential and from functioning well with others. Strengths must be managed, not indulged. The character we develop functions to monitor our strengths so that they serve us and don’t become a liability that holds us back.

With that in mind, Buckingham’s point is well taken. It is imperative that we know ourselves—our personality, our strengths—and not try to be something we are not. If we don’t, we diminish our effectiveness. Too often we head in a direction or a career path that does not compliment our innate strengths. These don’t change over our lifetime, and when we work with them rather than against them we can have more effective and fulfilling lives and be of greater service in any area that we chose to make our contribution.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:31 AM
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I Don’t Like My Strengths. Now What?

You’ve discovered your strengths and you don’t feel like they do much for you. “Wow. I’ve got inclusiveness. I’ll just put that on monster.com and watch the offers roll in. Right!?!” So you think, “Great. Now what do I do?” We all have similar and yet different combinations of strengths to build on. Granted some strengths may not seem as readily marketable in today’s workplace as others. However, this doesn’t mean that they are not of tremendous value in the right context. Finding that place is the key to your long term success.

Marcus Buckingham author of, Go Put Your Strengths to Work, responds to the question this way:

In many subtle and not-so-subtle ways, society tells us what’s valuable and what’s not—for example, that being strategic and future focused are tickets to the executive suite, whereas being a good wooer and craving significance for yourself get you not much of anything.

To make your greatest possible contribution, however, you’re going to have to look beyond society’s judgments.

All any of us can do is know ourselves well enough to identify where our greatest possible contributions lie, and then do our utmost to make those contributions real.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 07:11 AM
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Go Put Your Strengths to Work: 6 Powerful Steps to Achieve Outstanding Performance

Marcus Buckingham’s latest work, Go Put Your Strengths to Work begins by speculating on the source of the strengths movement. He speculates that perhaps for many it may have begun with Peters Drucker’s 1966 comment in The Effective Executive: “The effective executive builds on strengths—their own strengths, the strengths of superiors, colleagues, subordinates; and on the strengths of the situation.”

For me, it began in the early seventies when Jack McKinney—my Dad—began presenting his Know Yourself seminars in English-speaking countries around the world. A big part of his seminar was identifying and building on strengths and learning to manage them as the excessive use of strength becomes a weakness.

Whatever your introduction was to the strengths movement, Go Put Your Strengths to Work is an attempt build on the shoulders of giants to advance the current strengths movement from just identifying and labeling our strengths to learning how to actually put our strengths to work. This is the real point of the whole process. His practical system is very useful in helping you to do just that. The system is based on 6 steps:

1: Bust the Myths—So, What’s stopping you?
2: Get Clear—Do You Know What Your Strengths Are?
3: Free Your Strengths—How Do You Make the Most of What Strengthens You?
4: Stop Your Weaknesses—How Can You Cut Out What Weakens You?
5: Speak Up—How Do You Create Strong Teams?
6: Build Strong Habits—How Can You Make This Last Forever?

The process involves the careful observation of your work habits—using a guided questioning procedure—to turn the best of your job into the most of your job. Simply put, Buckingham defines your strengths as “those activities that make you feel strong.” Conversely, the best definition of weakness is any “activity that makes you feel weak.”

Of course, the system is backed by a web site—SimplyStrengths.com—accessed by using the now familiar code given with the purchase of the book. The release of the book is also backed by a nationwide tour by Marcus Buckingham beginning today. This event will also include a private showing of his short feature film entitled Trombone Player Wanted. You can get an invitation and a tour schedule on his website.

Related Interest:
StrengthsFinder 2.0: A New and Upgraded Edition of the Online Test

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:02 AM
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Career Match: Discover Your Ideal Career

AMACOM recently published a book—Career Match: Connecting Who You Are With What You'll Love to Do—that helps people discover their ideal work using a quick and easy to use system developed by Shoya Zichy based on the Myers-Briggs methodology. The self-assessment quiz is very simple yet quite accurate and highly revealing. After identifying your personality style, the book then walks you through the range of career choices best for you. It is a valuable tool not only for career and job changers, but to countless others seeking to choose a college major, find a first job, or even find new pursuits during retirement.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:57 AM
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Ego Check: Self Check

There's a fine line between being confident and having an out-of-control ego and it has to be managed carefully. No of us is immune to overconfidence and that line is all too easy to cross. Here are four questions Mathew Hayward recommends to ask yourself as a sort of self ego check:

Why am I doing this? We need to understand where our pride is coming from. Our pride needs to be based on real achievements and emotions. “We all receive pleasure and pain from how others perceive and respond to us. When taken too far, however, that tendency gives others control over our pride. Playing to others’ aspirations and expectations makes us characters in their play. Be fore long we become inauthentic, rudderless, and self-destructive.”

Am I getting the right input into this decision? “Finding and working effectively with the right foils is a critical way of managing one’s pride and, therefore, of curbing false confidence and hubris. The right foils know when to tell us when we are wrong, and they enable us to step back, step in, and step aside.” He adds, “…the key to real and lasting success is to have the right relationships with a number of trusted managers.”

Am I seeing, seeking, using, and sharing material feedback? Are we kidding ourselves about our situation? The key here is to get and use the best available feedback.

Have I clarified the conditions in which I could be wrong? It is wise to face the potential consequences of our decisions and actions today before they have occurred. By managing what could go wrong, we can factor in the possibility that our actions are driven by false confidence, even if we don’t know it at the time.

This is probably a lot like preaching to the choir. If you’re ego is out of control, you’re no doubt certain that you’re already doing these things.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:05 AM
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Keeping Your Ego in Check

If a little ego is a good thing, too much can be a very bad thing. Managing one’s ego is the subject of Mathew Hayward’s book, Ego Check. “Checking one’s ego at the door is entirely the wrong way to think about managing overconfidence and hubris because it drives a wedge between who we are and how we are supposed to act. Instead, the key is to check our decisions and actions, ahead of time to determine whether they reflect authentic or false confidence.”

He suggests that authentic pride is good—even necessary—as it helps us to “appreciate who we are and what we have done” without constantly seeking approval from others. He warns that “the danger is that authentic pride—based on real achievements and emotions—can quickly degenerate into excessive pride. We easily slip into becoming too full of ourselves and operate with clouded judgment. I believe it was Dirty Harry who said, “A man’s got to know his limitations.”

He breaks excessive pride—which arises when we develop an inflated view of ourselves based on our need for certain outcomes and approval—into three forms:

Dependent Pride: Pride based on what we hope to accomplish—future outcomes—rather than what we have done or are currently doing
Exaggerated Pride: Pride based on what we want to believe about ourselves rather than what the data or the feedback we are getting would really tell us (believing our own press releases) Overweening Pride: Pride driven by potential outcomes or what we imagine we are doing as opposed to what we are actually doing

Authentic Pride or Grounded Pride arises when we intrinsically appreciate ourselves based on candid and factual feedback. This type of pride can be a positive force in our lives.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 10:30 PM
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StrengthsFinder 2.0

“Most people think they know what they are good at. They are usually wrong . . . . And yet, a person can perform only from strength.”

—Peter Drucker

Gallup Press has just released StrengthsFinder 2.0. It’s a handy and improved follow-up to Now, Discover Your Strengths. What’s so new? Gallup has this to say:

Our research and knowledge base on the topic of human strengths have expanded dramatically over the past decade. StrengthsFinder 2.0 picks up where the first version left off, and it is designed to provide you with the latest discoveries and strategies for application. The language of 34 themes remains the same, but the assessment is faster and even more reliable. And, the results yield a much more in-depth analysis of your strengths — featuring a look at the nuances of what makes you unique, using more than 5,000 personalized Strengths Insights that we have discovered in recent years.

Going far beyond StrengthsFinder 1.0's shared theme descriptions, which can be found in Part II of StrengthsFinder 2.0, these highly customized Strengths Insights will help you understand how each of your top five themes plays out in your life on a much more personal level. For example, even though you and a friend may both have the same theme in your top five, the way this theme is manifested will not be the same. Therefore, each of you would receive entirely different, personalized descriptions of how that theme operates in your lives.

These new Strengths Insights describe what makes you stand out when compared to the millions of people we have studied. Once you have completed the online assessment, you will receive a comprehensive Strengths Discovery and Action-Planning Guide that is based on your StrengthsFinder 2.0 results. This guide includes:

• Your top five theme report, built around the new Strengths Insight descriptions
• 50 Ideas for Action (10 for each of your top five themes) based on thousands of best-practice suggestions we reviewed
• A Strengths Discovery Activity that helps you think about how your talents, investment, experience, skills, and knowledge work together to build strengths
• A Strength-Based Action Plan for setting specific goals for building and applying your strengths in the next week, month, and year

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:51 AM
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When Making Judgments About Our Leaders and Others

Pulitzer Prize winning New York Times journalist James Reston (1909-1995) wrote in his memoirs about a trap we can fall into when judging others. He related how his wife, Sally, help to temper his comments and writing. It’s a trap that we most easily fall into when we are overly focused on our own agenda or frustrated over simply not getting our own way. It’s good advice for any of us to keep in mind when we are getting ready to air our opinion.

One of the blind spots of reporters is that after a while we are inclined to forget that officials are people. Preoccupied with issues, we come to regard them as liberals or conservatives, honest or crooked, but seldom as ordinary folk who have wives and children and cry when they’re hurt. Sally was always saving me from this folly. She knew a lot of these official families and knew also when their kids were sick or flunking out of school or fiddling with drugs. Thus when some political luminary seemed to be in a slump, talking more nonsense than usual, she would say maybe he was worrying about the family, or, as I was inclined to believe, about his own wandering and wayward habits. Still it was useful to be reminded that these headline characters have things to worry about other than the national debt—their own debts, for example.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:30 AM
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Take Another Look at Your Early Morning Routine

Jim Citrin of executive search firm Spencer Stuart reports in his Yahoo column that, "the quiet of the morning is often the time when your mind is at its clearest and most well-suited to solving important problems."

Steve Murphy, CEO of publishing company Rodale, says, "A line in a William Blake poem inspired me to think differently about my day: ‘Think in the morning, act in the noon, read in the evening, and sleep at night.' This has made a huge difference in my life. Now, I take out a yellow pad every morning and write my thoughts for the day, which allows me to be much more strategic and proactive than reactive."

Jim also confrims that a successful day usually starts early in the morning. (What was that Ben Franklin said?) He found that of the 20 executives he questioned, the latest any of them wake up is 6am, and almost 80 percent wake up at 5:30 or earlier.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 07:26 AM
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Goldsmith's Gold: Stop Trying to Help People Who Don’t Want to Change

You can help some of the people some of the time, but you can’t help all the people all the time. Not everyone wants help. Not everyone wants to change. Some people can’t or won’t be lead. It’s a fact of life. Marshall explains, “This may sound harsh, but some people are unsalvageable. You’re only banging your head against a wall if you think you can fix them.” Some flaws can’t be coached away by any boss, especially if the following conditions exist:

Stop trying to change people who don’t think they have a problem.

Stop trying to change people who are pursuing the wrong strategy for the organization. If they’re going the wrong direction, all you do is help them get there faster.

Stop trying to change people who should not be in their job. Move them on.

Stop trying to help people who think everyone else is the problem. People like this will never give up on their near-religious belief that any failure is someone else’s fault.

More importantly, we need to be sure we are not deluding ourselves into being one of these people. Always be looking to change, grow and improve. Ask. Others are sure to point the way.

This is from What Got You Here Won't Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 07:59 AM
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5 Leadership Lessons: Robin Sharma

  The ultimate competitive advantage of your enterprise comes down to a single imperative—your ability to grow and develop leaders faster than your competition. The more quickly you can get every single person in the company demonstrating leadership behavior—regardless of their position—the more quickly you will lead the field.

  Being a leader isn’t about being liked. It’s about doing what’s right. Great leaders run their own race, making the right decisions and worrying little about public opinion. They are courage in action.

  Try not to teach your fears to your kids. Introduce your children to what’s possible. If you see the world as a place of limitation, so will those little people you are raising.

  Every day, life will send you little windows of opportunity. Your destiny will ultimately be defined by how you respond to these windows of opportunity. Shrink from them and your life will be small. Feel the fear and run to them anyway and your life will be big.

  Remember, every great leader (or visionary or brave thinker) was initially laughed at. Now they are revered. Push the envelope. Refuse to accept anything remotely close to mediocrity. Let go of the chains that have bound you to the ordinary. And definitely leave the crowd.

These five lessons are from The Greatness Guide by speaker and leadership coach, Robin Sharma.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 08:59 AM
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Goldsmith's Gold: Feedforward

Marshall Goldsmith introduces a concept called feedforward in his book, What Got You Here Won't Get You There. Essentially it is a refocusing of the practice of feedback. Feedback tells us what has happened or what we have done. Our history. Feedforward is future oriented. It is asking for ideas that you can put into practice in the future. It takes away much of the perceived negativity that is associated with feedback—criticism and the tendency to kill the messenger.

Instead of, “What did I do wrong?” feedforward asks, “I am trying to improve in this area. What kinds of things might I do in the future to improve in this area?”

It works because, while they don’t particularly like hearing criticism, successful people love getting ideas for the future. If changing a certain type of behavior is important to them, they will gobble up any ideas that are aimed at changing that behavior.

It works because we can change the future but not the past.

It works because helping people be right is more productive than proving them wrong.

On the most elemental level, it works because people do not take feedforward as personally as feedback.

We can focus on hearing without having to worry about responding.

Marshall adds, “Feedforward forces us to ask—and in doing so, we enlarge our universe of people with useful ideas. Asking, of course, gives the other person a license to answer. I cannot overestimate how valuable this license can be. I’m sure that all of us are surrounded by smart well-meaning friends who “understand” us better than we “understand” ourselves. I suspect they would love to help us; most people like to help others. But they hold back because they think it is rude or intrusive to try to help someone who has not asked for our assistance. Asking solves this.

This is from What Got You Here Won't Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 12:08 AM
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Goldsmith's Gold: "You asked for my opinion and now you're arguing with me?"

When we ask a friend, "What do you think I should do in this situation?" we are setting up the expectation that we want an answer—and that we will give the answer full consideration and quite possibly use it. We are not announcing that we're initiating an argument.

But that's exactly what we're doing when we ask for feedback from someone and then immediately express our opinion. This certainly true when our opinion is negative ("I'm not sure about that . . . ."). Whatever we say, however softly we couch it, our opinion will sound defensive. It will resemble a rationalization, a denial, a negation, or an objection.

Stop doing that. Treat every peice of advice as a gift or a compliment and simply say, "Thank you." No one expects you to act on every piece of advice. If you learn to listen—and act on the advice that makes sense—the people around you will be thrilled.

Additionally, he cautions that it is not appropriate to pass judgments on people's opinions when we specifically ask them to give it to us. Naturally we don’t like to be critiqued, but “the only sure thing that comes out of passing judgment on people’s efforts to help us is that they won’t help us again…. No matter what you privately think of the suggestion, you must keep your thoughts to yourself, hear the person out, and say, ‘Thank you.’” Solid advice.

This is from What Got You Here Won't Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith.

Posted by Michael McKinney at 09:38 AM
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Growth: Moving to the Next Level

It’s not that you don’t know who you are or where you’re going or what you want to achieve. Nor is it that you don’t have an adequate sense of self-worth. What’s wrong is that you have no idea how your behavior is coming across to the people who matter—your boss, colleagues, subordinates, customers, clients and family.

You think you have all the answers, but others see it as arrogance.

You think you’re contributing to a situation with helpful comments, but others see it as butting in.

You think you’re delegating effectively, but others see it as shirking responsibilities.

You think you’re holding your tongue, but others see it as unresponsiveness.

You think you’re letting people think for themselves, but others see it as ignoring them.

These are the kinds of things that are holding you back. Executive coach Marshall Goldsmith, pulls no punches in his new book, What Got You Here Won't Get You There. This book is for those who really want to change. It’s for those who really want to see things for what they are and do something about it. There is something you'll recognize about yourself in this book.

We all hold superstitious beliefs—a mistaken belief that a specific activity followed by positive reinforcement is actually the cause of that positive reinforcement. Superstitions based on the mistaken idea that because I behave this way, I achieve results. Therefore, I must be achieving results because I behave this way. These superstitions make it hard for us to change. Goldsmith writes that this is the paradox of success: The beliefs that carried us here may be holding us back in our quest to go there.

Goldsmith looks at 21 specific habits that may be holding us back from getting to the next level. We’ll look at some of these over the next several weeks. How are you coming across to other people? Really? Are you sure? How are you holding yourself back?

Posted by Michael McKinney at 07:55 AM
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